Two Inches Too Far

I have read many stories on this site where a man willingly submits to abuse and humiliation from his spouse and seems to love it. I thought that it was time to do a story from the other perspective of a man who doesn't find it warm and fuzzy to be treated as if he is a thing and not a man. Anyway, hope you enjoy but if not I sincerely apologize.

*****

The barkeep came over to me with a concerned look on his face as I motioned for another drink. With a comforting smile he quietly asked, "You really think that is wise Jake?" I looked at him and knew he was trying to help me but I didn't care, "It might not be wise Walt but it is necessary." The barkeep just looked at me with surprise, "Alright Jake, one more but I am calling you a cab tonight OK?" I was drunk and depressed but not too depressed to make a joke, "Why would you call me a cab when you know my name is Jake?" Walt smiled politely as he went off to make another concoction that might help deaden my pain.

As for calling me a cab later on it really won't be needed. Tonight the only place left I have to call my own is the car I came in and that is where I planned on sleeping till the morning light. The bar had thinned down quite a bit when Walt made his way over to me again. With true concern in his voice he prodded, "Jake I have known you for twenty years and never saw you put away the amount of booze you did tonight. What is eating you man?"

I looked at him and my first impulse was to tell him to screw himself and mind his own affairs, but then I realized I really needed to tell someone else my story, if for no other reason than to keep my sanity. I was hurt and even more ashamed at my actions over the last few months and was looking for some form of absolution. Even though Walt was not a priest he was a bartender and tonight that was close enough for me. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, "Alright Walt, if I tell you please don't judge me alright? Promise me, OK." Walt looked at me a moment and finally answered, "Jake I've been doing this job for about thirty years and the one thing I have learned is to never judge anyone. Jake I give you my solemn promise that whatever you tell me it will go no further than us."

Looking at Walt I knew he was telling me the truth. Some people you just have faith in and Walt was one of those guys. So I started my tale, "Walt before we begin, tell me what you think of me as a man." I could see Walt's eyebrows lift so I quickly added, "I'm not going gay in my old age but I would like to know what another person really thinks of my physical presence, so if you would give me a description of myself please I would really appreciate it. Also Walt, don't try to be polite and hold back, be frank and honest if you would."

Walt took a gander at me as if he was really seeing me for the first time, "OK Jake, here goes, I peg your age about 58 or 59. Your face is still good looking but shows the wear and tear of those years with every wrinkle that is ingrained on it. Your body is also showing the effects of time buddy, your hair is thin and your waistline is somewhat thick, but you are not obese. On the plus side your face shows a man who is friendly, honest and intelligent. You always wear a suit and you are always shaved which is rare these days. This tells me that you take pride in yourself. Also, while not a physical characteristic, you are one of the neatest men I have ever known and an all-around good Joe. You always police up your area when you are done to help out the waitress and you tip well, which shows me that you also respect people. I would also add that your voice is pleasant and you exude a lot of self-confidence, or at least you did till tonight. Now are you going to tell me what is going on Jake?"

I smiled a knowing smile, "In a minute Walt, in a minute." I took a sip of my drink before continuing; "Now I want you to describe my wife Vickie. Again, be honest and don't hold back OK. Please say what you want as I won't be shocked or mad, I just need to hear the truth, no matter what." Walt shook his head in bewilderment, "Where is this all going Jake?" I prodded him again, "If you want to know the story I really need to see Vickie through another man's eyes. Just be honest Walt if you please."

Walt took another long breath and exhaled slowly as he worked up Vickie's image in his mind's eye. "Well Jake, Vickie is in her mid-fifties but looks much younger. Although, I feel that much of that is due to the magic of some plastic surgeon and not just good genes. She is a classy broad but she always dresses to expose as much of her assets as possible." He stopped in assessment and gave me a guarded look, "Let's face it Jake, she still has a great figure and a face you want to look at twice. I guess I would have to describe Vickie as a very hot and seductive woman."

"Thank you Walt for that very accurate assessment of both of us. Now let me ask you one more question before I begin. You have known us both for over twenty years Walt. Did you ever notice how couples that have been together that long seem to have similarities to each other? It's almost like time has somehow molded them in similar ways? Well Walt, let me ask you straight out, do we seem like we have grown alike as a couple having lived together for over thirty years?"

Walt shook his head, "No Jake you don't. Outside of dressing very nice you two are about as different as night and day. She is svelte and you aren't. She is demanding and shrewish at times and you are one of the nicest guys I have ever known. Now can you tell me what happened to you?"

I nodded my head in the affirmative as I took another swig of my drink. "Alright Walt I guess I have to get it out even though a part of me never wants to speak of it again. But I have to warn you that you will probably be disgusted my wimpyness over the last six months. I know I am."

Walt gave me a knowing smile, "You would really have to go a far piece in your tale to make me think badly of you Jake."

I nodded my thanks, "Well Walt we will see. OK, how do I begin?" I sat on my stool looking at my drink and without consciously being aware of it the words just started pouring out of me, "Vickie and I have been married nearly thirty three years and I really have loved her more with each passing year. I know what other people see, a shrill demanding and vain woman who is trying to defeat the ravages of time by surgery, diet and exercise but I cannot look at her without seeing the beautiful young girl I fell in love with so many years ago."

I took another sip of my drink, "I don't know if you are aware of this Walt but she found real success in the business world while I struck a vein of mediocrity. I guess I really don't have the killer instinct to advance. I settled and was happy with what I had while she fought the glass ceiling and beat it."

I looked at my hands noting how age had twisted and changed them, making me feel even older than my 59 years, "Well, everything has a price and the price of her success was a family. Vickie refused to have kids when we were young as she wanted a career and when she finally got that career it was too late. Along the way I proved to be a disappointment to Vickie as she soared with the eagles and I stayed on the ground with the other squirrels hunting for nuts." I gave a little laugh as the imagery of my analogy struck a humorous cord in my befuddled mind.

When I recovered I continued, "Well, we made it for thirty three years and I hoped that as we aged she would appreciate my other qualities as a husband. I was supportive, helpful and faithful but it was too no avail as her contempt for me seemed to grow with each step of the corporate ladder she climbed."

I looked at Walt and saw him staring at me with a rapt interest, "Well about six months ago Vickie came home from a conference and told me she had met another man and wanted to sleep with him. Now, she didn't ask me, she told me. I told her that was never going to happen but she laid into me telling me that if I didn't like it there was the door."

I needed a sip of my drink and noticed it was getting low, "Well Walt, I couldn't dissuade her and I finally caved. I didn't want to lose her so I agreed that she could sleep with another guy if that's what she really needed. Well my friend she took my reluctant acceptance to heart. Over the next few weeks she was late on numerous nights and then started to go out for weekends. Not just Friday night or Saturday but whole weekends spent with her lover. During this time I started to pick up on looks from her that indicated she had lost all respect for me and yet I said nothing hoping that somehow it would eventually all go away."

I shook the empty glass and this time Walt fairly leapt at making me another concoction of the pain easing elixir. He was back in a flash and with another sip to fortify me I resumed. "You see Walt, I figured that whatever this guy had he could not love her like I did and at the end of the day that would be my salvation but I was mistaken."

I felt my eyes begin to water as the pain gripped my heart but I would not give in to it and pushed on, "During those six months my life went from bad to intolerable. In the beginning she would come home from her dates and be kind and tender, kissing me and holding on to me like a lost kid and telling me how wonderful I was and how I must really love her. We still even had sex but that was only in the first month after her announcement. All good things come to an end and the tenderness she showed me soon dried up like a puddle in the Sahara. By the second month she was becoming shrewish, telling me what to do and how to do it. That wasn't enough for her as she then insisted that I help her dress for her "dates" as she called them and like a love sick deluded fool I went along with it." My eyes stared into the distance as I pictured her in sexy lingerie bubbling with happiness over how her lover would adore her in this outfit, an outfit she would never have worn for me.

I snapped back into reality for find Walt staring raptly at me, "Anyway, I still clung to the foolish belief that she would eventually tire of her affair and we could rebuild our marriage and regain what I felt we had lost." I stopped for a moment as I realized just how stupid my last statement sounded even to me before I picked up with my story, "Basically, Vickie treated me like I was her own personal butler and I allowed it even though I can't imagine any butler putting up with that much shit."

Taking a quick drink for the dryness in my throat I recommenced my tale, "His name was Darren. She reveled in telling me that and went to lengths telling me about his lovemaking skills and the heights of ecstasy he brought her too. One day she took hold of my manhood gently and stroked it lovingly bringing me to a full erection. I really thought we were going to make love but then while still holding me in her hand she contemptuously said, "Pathetic!" After that she launched into a detailed description of her lover's equipment sparing me no detail. As far as I could tell he was about two inches longer than I am and a little thicker around. While she talked my erection disappeared and then she did the cruelest thing that has ever been done to me." I stopped trying to compose myself and took another swallow of my Dutch courage, "Walt, she laughed at me! Me! The man who had loved her unconditionally for over thirty years! She stripped away my self-respect because some clown had me by two inches? I did nothing to deserve that, nothing."

My hands were shaking as I took a long swig of my drink to deaden the pain that had just swelled in my heart and then continued as I put the glass on the bar, "The next few months I watched her become more severe and crueler with a constant litany of how worthless I was as a man. Each day I died a little more inside but I still stuck with her knowing that Darren was now the light in her life but it couldn't last. Somewhere deep down inside I still felt that this would eventually go away and she would want me back. Well, I prayed it would anyway."

I felt my eyes misting as I looked at Walt and saw his face twist in anger. "I don't blame you Walt for being disgusted with me. I guess that maybe Vickie might have been right." Walt fairly exploded, "RIGHT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME! That woman is a cast iron bitch!" He was on a roll, "If she ever steps foot in this bar again I will throw her skanky ass out in a New York second!" He then seemed to deflate as he looked at me, "I'm sorry Jake. I am not mad at you at all. Please continue on with your story OK?"

I nodded my head again to signal my assent but also to clear it before I got the rough part. "Well everyday Vickie and I seemed to be moving in different directions with our lives and marriage and yet I didn't want to lose her so I put up with everything she threw at me and believe me there was plenty. Then today, about 10:30 in the morning I got a call at work from Vickie and she sounded like she used to before this whole nightmare began. She was happy and made me feel that we had turned a corner. She asked me to come home early as she wanted to surprise me tonight. You know she actually called me tiger. The last time she did that must have been twenty years ago." I had to stop and rub my eyes because something seemed to have gotten in them.

Walt's concern was evident, "You OK Jake?" I looked at him without any expression as he said, "Let me get you another drink pal, on the house." I stared down at the glass and was shocked to realize that I had emptied another one. The funny thing was that I seemed to be more sober now as I told my story than I was before I started. Maybe it was because I was focusing now.

Walt brought me the drink and I took a hefty swig because I knew this next part was going to be painful. "Well I left work early and got home around one in the afternoon and there was Vickie wearing stockings, garter belt, high heels and nothing else. She looked like a goddess!" I took another swig as I let that mental image sink in for Walt.

"Well, Vickie strolled seductively over to me and gave me a kiss like I was her long lost lover and then whispered in my ear. "You have been so wonderful over the last couple of months that you deserve a treat!" I stopped shaking head in disbelief, reliving the moment in my memory again before looking back up to Walt, "Her voice was so alluring and her body molded into mine and she was achieving her desired effect. I was so aroused that I just wanted to reclaim my wife but she had other ideas in mind."

Taking another mouthful of booze I forged on with my tale of woe, "Well, Vickie asked me if I wanted to play a game and like a sap I said "Yes." She gave a throaty laugh as she rubbed my erection through my pants and asked me if I trusted her. Again all I could do was to say, "Yes." Well, she gave me a devilish smile and began to slowly strip me naked. I was more aroused than I had been in years as I naively gave thanks to the powers that be that she had finally come back to her senses and wanted me back."

The bitterness of my mental state showed in the way I took a deep swig from my drink and then started coughing as it was too much. I noticed Walt's concerned look as he pondered my mental state and how it must be affected by the quantity of booze I had consumed. I tried to alleviate his worry by stating, "Don't worry Walt I'm not crazy...or drunk for that matter either."

I wanted to get this story out so I began again, "Vickie soon had me naked in the living room and then rubbed up against me so seductively I would've have done anything for her. Vickie knew she had me as she playfully asked in a little girls' voice, "Do you twust me Jakey?" As I recall I just nodded my assent as she seductively led me by my manhood back to our bedroom. I was anxious and started to put my hands on her hips pushing her towards the bed but she stopped and turned on me flatly stating, "No mister tonight is all about me! I will tell you what and where and how you will do it!" I had believed my beloved Vickie was back but this was the more domineering and evil Vickie now revealing herself.

I hadn't noticed that she had moved a big old sturdy antique wooden chair into our room until she began to push me towards it." I stopped momentarily as I remembered with shame how powerless I had been to refuse her. I blinked my eyes a few times trying to clear my thoughts and resumed again, "Once she had me sitting in it she pulled out some plastic tie wraps and started to secure me to the chair. I was nervous but when I asked her what she was doing she just asked me if I still trust her. What could I do? I said yes and she secured my wrists and ankles to the chair quite tightly. Actually too tight as they really cut into me when I tried to break them later."

I pulled the sleeves back from the long sleeve shirt I was wearing and you could clearly see the welts and scabs where the tie wraps had cut in and broken the skin. Walt sucked in his breathe as he viewed the angry welts before asking, "Do you want me to get the first aid kit and see to those Jake? I think they could use some disinfectant at least." I took a drink and replied quietly, "No, they serve as a reminder."

I resumed talking as I recalled with vivid clarity the events I now started to relate, "When she had me bound to the chair she gave me a chilling smile that really scared me and then put a heavy pillow case over my head. I couldn't see anything but could still hear a little. I heard her talking and to tell you the truth I was really nervous. I sat there for what seemed forever before Vickie pulled off the hood yelling "Ta-da!" Standing In front of me was her Darren completely nude. At first I thought it was Mr. Clean, only naked...and not a cartoon."

I needed the alcohol now as I tried to drink the memory away that would continue to haunt me for a long time to come. "So as I sat there unable to move she sauntered over to Darren and gave him a kiss that was even steamier than the one she gave me when I came home. Soon he was growing hard as she manipulated him and then unexpectedly she stopped and while giving me another of her devilish looks said in a matter of fact voice, "Isn't Darren well hung honey? Now I am sure you can see why I don't need you anymore sweetie but I did think you deserved a treat so tonight I am going to let you see me and Darren making love. How do you like that baby?"

I stopped as I recalled the malevolent look on her face as she held her lover and taunted me. "Well, I didn't want to see them so I ordered her in a firm voice to release me. Her response was to start going down on him. After watching for a few seconds and feeling queasy I begged her to release me, as I really didn't think I could stand to see them doing it. The two of them laughed and assured me that I would love it once I saw how a "real man" makes love to Vickie. She broke away from him them coming over to me and kissing me and trying to put her tongue into my mouth which I refused. She finally gave up but said in a harsh tone, "You'll taste a lot more of that tonight my love I assure you!" then they both laughed even louder."

I looked at Walt to gauge his reaction. I was stunned, as what I saw was an angry man, something I had never seen in Walt in the twenty some years I had known him. I could only assume that it was anger at me for being such a dumb wimp with Vickie. I knew I needed to just get the story over so I ignored Walt's demeanor and moved on, "Darren and Vickie both took turns humiliating me verbally, seeking to strip away my dignity as a man. I don't know how anyone could derive pleasure from that kind of humiliation because I certainly didn't. I never, in our entire married life did anything to Vickie that would merit that kind of treatment."