Playing Games Ch. 02

I can remember...

It was my first semester at Bryson State University and I was so green. I had never been away from home, and I wanted to experience everything but I couldn't shed my shyness. So instead, I cowered in fear at anything new or anyone new. But then one day fate sent me someone new that I couldn't run away from, Rich. He saw me reading alone in the cafe and pounced. He flirted with me and made me feel special.

And slowly but surely brought me out of my shell. After a few weeks of dating he convinced me to have sex with the old line, "If you loved me..." You know the rest. Well, I fell for it and lost my virginity to him, a man I loved and who I thought loved me. Afterwards, he stopped calling and texting me and I couldn't help but think I had done something wrong. I needed to know what I did so I could fix it and we could be happy again.

So I went looking for him. I asked his frat brothers and a few of his football teammates and everyone claimed they hadn't seen him. Exhausted and depressed, I trudged back to my room. Before I could even reach the door, I heard the screams.

"Ahh, shit! Yes! Fuck me like that!"

I prayed it wasn't my roommate, Michelle and her boyfriend, Alex again because I couldn't handle another night of that. But of course the screams were from my dorm room, except it wasn't Alex's name she was calling out. It was, Richie? I couldn't believe my ears. But it was crystal clear as she screamed,

"That's it Richie baby! I'm almost there! Oh shit! Richie, I'm gonna-"

The room was silent then and I couldn't believe what I'd just heard. I wouldn't believe it. I went in the room as softly as possible as not to alarm them and there he was collapsed over her and kissing her neck and back. He was murmuring words and I strained to hear. So I quietly moved closer, where I could hear his words between breathy kisses.

"Shit Chelle, (kiss) Ashley (kiss) could never (kiss) put it down like you (kiss).

I gasped and ran as far from that room as my feet would take me. I ended up in front of Lansing, the rec center, breathing hard and holding back a river of tears. I couldn't understand why? I loved him. Gave him all of me. And he just shit on me like I was fucking nothing. I was consumed by these thoughts and feelings when someone called my name. I almost jumped out of my skin but realized it was just Ezra.

"Are you ok? I didn't mean to scare you."

He looked at me a second longer before asking what was wrong? I knew Ezra from my English class and he was always so nice, making me laugh, and helping me with my work. He was a true friend and in that moment I needed one.

I cracked and broke down into a million pieces before his eyes. Ezra didn't freak out though. He just wrapped me in his arms and held me tight against his chest, semi-smothering me in his embrace. I cried into his shirt, until the sobs became whimpers but he didn't didn't let me go. He just held me.

"Do you want me to take you back to your room?"

I shook my head, "No!" against his chest.

"Well then, you can stay with me tonight. Is that alright?"

I nodded my head and croaked out, "Yes."

Then he calmly led me to his car, and to his home. Which was literally a house, not an apartment, a fully furnished, two story, iron fence having, house. He showed me in and I couldn't believe it was all his.

"How do you pay for this?"

He grinned, "I'm a secret billionaire."

I looked at him incredulously. He laughed before getting somber,

"I don't. It was paid off when my Grandma died. She left it to me in her will."

I gave him a quick hug and apologized for bringing it up. He simply nodded, before telling me it was fine.

"I know she's in a better place watching down on me."

After that he showed me to a room that he said was all mine. I thanked him again before calling it a night. But just before I closed the bedroom door he stopped me and said,

"I'm here for you if you need me. Okay?"

I nodded and closed the door. I heard his steps get softer and waited until the sound disappeared, before laying down for a good cry. But it wouldn't come. I couldn't cry. I realized I was hurt, but more than that I was angry. With Rich, Michelle, but mainly myself. How could I have been so stupid? How didn't I see what he was after? How did I let him use me like that?

Then something clicked in my head and I decided that night to learn how to think like a man. Because I'd be damned if I'd go through heartache like this ever again due to simple ignorance.

So I read every article, every book, listened and talked to every guy I knew and sometimes didn't know and I catalogued every piece of information into a handbook of sorts.

When I finally felt I had gathered enough information I brought it to my socio-interaction professor, Dr. Hope, who allowed me to write my spring semester thesis on the male mind.

Terrified me since I had only dated Rich.