I'm Allowed To

Big thanks to Bert_Fegg for editing this and making it an actually coherent story.

***

It shouldn't have surprised me the way it did. Between the two of us my twin sister had always been more outgoing, more adventurous and is it turned out more willing to ignore what society deems appropriate. Still, only a few days back I would have never thought that our relationship would change in the way it had or that she would make that change so irresistible. It's too late to question whether what we have done is right or not, all I can do now is to look back and think about when it all started.

The humidity that day was suffocating like it often is in the northeast and, of course, rather than being in the comfort of our air-conditioned home Sara had dragged me with her to the park. Sara had always liked hiking and since I was her twin brother that meant that I liked hiking too. Well, liked isn't the right word, honestly, hate is more appropriate it's just that between my sister bugging me to go with her and my mother insisting that I stop being lazy and get some exercise with Sara, I had no choice.

The park we went to was large and had no shortage of trails that went up and down some very rugged and heavily forested hills. It was after climbing one of the larger hills that I begged Sara for a break. Between the heat, the humidity, and my feeble efforts to fight against gravity I was a sweaty mess and out of breath. Sara, who was far from winded had mercy on me and let me have a few minutes to catch my breath. While I was hunched over and trying to suck down as much air as I could get, I heard the distinctly condescending laughter of my twin which caused me to look up at her. Sara was breathing quite easily unlike me, although I did notice that I wasn't the only one that was sweating. The tight blue tank top she was wearing clung to her skin thanks to the added moisture and showcased the flatness of her midriff and the curve of her breasts.

"See something interesting Adam?"

All too late I realized that I was staring and looked up to her face to see Sara looking at me with a vicious smirk on her lips. All I could do was smile back sheepishly and say, "This heat is making me space out."

"Sure it is," Sara answered with heavy sarcasm. It was obvious that Sara didn't buy my excuse and I felt mortified. Getting caught ogling a woman is always pretty embarrassing but when it's your sister that catches you its hard not to feel like a pervert.

"Come on; let's get going already you lazy bastard."

Sara set off along the trail again leaving me no choice but to follow after her. Having only just been embarrassed for looking my twin sister over I did my best not to stare at Sara's ass or the slender legs that her shorts exposed, but it was difficult not to. I guess you could say that I've always been aware of the fact that my sister is attractive and I'll admit that I've peeked at her before but it was mostly curious glances. This last incident was the first time that I had been caught staring by her or at least the first time that she had made it clear that she knew what I was doing. Rather than continuing with my less than brotherly behavior and potentially reliving the embarrassment of that incident over again, I ran to catch up with Sara and walk side by side with her.

Rather graciously for her, Sara let the tank top incident go and we exchanged idle chit chat about our plans for the summer and what classes we planned to take once we went back to school for our third years. Eventually the hike came to an end when we made it back to the lot where Sara's car was parked. I collapsed into the passenger seat feeling drained while Sara slid into the driver's seat effortlessly. Sara started the engine up and cranked the A.C which helped me feel a little less exhausted as I stared off into space.

"Adam," I heard her say.

With the miniscule amount of energy I had left I turned my head to the left to see Sara looking at me.

"Thanks for coming with me; I know you didn't really want to." The smile she gave me seemed unusually genuine for Sara; usually when Sara smiled at me it was because she had something to lord over me. While we had always been close, our sibling bond had been characterized by a friendly competiveness and a healthy exchange of insults. Moments of open affection or appreciation are rare between us and there was a warmth and intensity to her eyes that I hadn't seen before. Being her twin brother I thought I knew all of her looks and moods, but this was something new from her and I felt exposed and unsure of what to do while she looked at me with open warmth in her eyes.

"It's no problem really, don't worry about it."

Sara looked at me a little while longer but eventually turned away and put the car in gear for the drive home. At first I felt relieved when she looked away from me but that relief died when I became aware of how awkwardly quiet the drive home had become. After only a few minutes I caved and switched on the radio, there was something about the silence between us that made me feel uneasy.

***

Later that night after dinner I partook of an activity that was more my speed; sitting on the couch and watching T.V. Sara was the first to join me in my lazy activity when she plopped down on the couch next to me. Our Mother and Father joined us in the family room a few minutes later and we all watched Television until about half past eleven. With a tired sounding groan our Father rose from the loveseat He and our Mother had been sharing before he said, "Alright Kids I'm going to bed. Try to keep the noise down."

"O.k. Dad," me and Sara replied in unison.

As dad moved towards the stairs our mother stood up as well. "I guess that means I'm going to sleep too. If I woke him up later I'd never hear the end of it. Goodnight kids"

"Goodnight Mom," we replied in unison again.

With me alone with Sara again I noticed the awkward feeling from before return. I still felt vulnerable being in the same room as my twin and it was difficult to converse with her they way we usually did. I didn't know why but ever since that strange look she gave me before our ride home I found it nerve wracking to be alone with Sara.

After twenty endlessly awkward minutes of me trying to keep up our usual exchange of quips I caved in and stood up from the couch and said, "I'm going to bed."

"Really?" she asked with obvious confusion and I think even a little disappointment in her voice. "You're usually up so late."

With my withdrawal from this situation imminent I felt comfortable speaking to her again."Hey, I normally do but someone had to drag their twin brother with them to the park and tire him out."

"Sorry," she responded with a grin,"But someone has to keep my lazy brother in shape." After scratching the back of her neck nervously she spoke to me again, "You know what Adam, I'm tired too."

I headed for the second floor and Sara followed after me. I don't claim to be a very perceptive person but I swear I felt her eyes on me the entire time I was climbing the stairs. Just before I could reach for my bedroom door I heard her say my name softly and I turned round to find her standing only a few inches from me.

"Um, is there..." I was caught by surprise when she wrapped her arms around me and leaned her head against my chest. "Is this some special occasion or did I do something right today?"

"I'm your twin sister you jackass! "Sara said in a stern voice that sounded just short of being angry. "I'm allowed to hug you."

Suddenly feeling guilty for questioning her motives I said, "Yeah, I guess you are" in a sheepish voice and made a tentative effort of wrapping my arms around her back. Sara's hold on me tightened in return as she nuzzled her face against my chest.

While I had thought that being alone in the living room with Sara had been awkward, it was nothing compared to this hug. After a very quiet thirty seconds I finally spoke to her again, "Um, Sara I was planning on going to sleep sometime tonight."

Sara's hold on me loosened but she didn't let go of me entirely and kept her hands latched onto my shoulders as she looked up at me. Even in the darkness of the hallway at night I could tell that she was looking at me with the same intense look I had seen earlier in the day during the car ride home.

"Good night, Adam," she said before she let go of me and entered her room. For a short time I just stood in front of my bedroom door feeling dumbfounded. To most people a hug from their sibling isn't the kind of thing that leaves them scratching their heads but coming from Sara it was odd. This was the woman that thought sibling affection meant trying to trip her brother on his way down the stairs or reciting the most embarrassing moments of my childhood in excruciating detail to our friends. Eventually my tired body took control and led me to bed. As I laid in bed and tried to fall asleep I found that Sara's strange behavior today dominated my thoughts, especially the realization that it had felt great to have my sister press herself against me.

I don't know if it was suddenness of the hug or that the show of affection was so uncharacteristic for her but it had left me feeling like I had earned the affection of an attractive woman that I had just met but happened to look exactly like my sister. The feel of her feminine build against me while she pressed her face against my chest was an arousing experience but that feeling was mixed in with the emotions that Sara's scent caused in me. My twin is the one person in the world I could identify by their smell alone and that scent that usually floods my mind with memories of Sara and a feeling of familial closeness was mixed with the sensual experience of our hug.

***

The next morning I had a short reprieve from thinking about my twin's behavior since I'm anything but a morning person. It always seems to take about twenty minutes and a good breakfast before I could be described as coherent. So I sat by my kitchen table with a bowl of cereal in front of me, while I stared ahead vacantly and shoved spoonfuls of cereal into my mouth. A short time later I was joined in the kitchen by my mother who was dressed and ready to leave for work for the day like my father already had.

"Good morning sweetie."

I grunted in response.

"I wish you and Sara would consider getting jobs for the summer and stop being so lazy." Between the playful smirk on her face and the rarely serious and almost always sarcastic attitude that her daughter mirrored, I knew that my mother was joking. She was always beyond thrilled to have her children home and my parents made enough cash to allow Sara and me to go to the schools of our choice so it wasn't like we needed the money.

"You and your sister behave today, okay," she said before she planted a kiss on my forehead.

I mumbled something approaching a "Bye Mom" before she left the house and left me alone in the kitchen again. With the peace that comes from seclusion I managed to finish my breakfast and headed towards the sink to rinse my dish out. As I toiled away in front of the sink I heard the sound of someone walking into the kitchen from behind me. I knew it had to be Sara since she was the only other person still home.

Before I could even turn around to greet her, I felt Sara's arms snake around my chest as she hugged me from behind.

"Good morning my lazy brother," she said warmly.

"Good morning," I echoed nervously with the realization that I could feel my twin sister's breasts pressing into my back.

Eventually Sara released her hold of me and backed away which finally allowed me to turn and face her. I found her sitting on the kitchen counter top with her feet playfully kicking the air.

"So, what are we going to do today," she asked me.

"You mean besides cooking crystal meth and designing a 3D printable lower receiver for AR-15s?"

"Uh huh," she answered nonchalantly which acknowledged my crappy joke and put me on the spot to give an answer except that I didn't have one so I just said, "I don't know, what do you want to do?"

"How about we go to the park again?"

"Ugh"

"Alright how about we just walk around the neighborhood then?"

I didn't relish the thought of going out into the summer heat but Sara gave me this pouty look that I found hard to say no to. "Fine," I said reluctantly. Sara smiled mischievously and hopped off the counter top before she dragged me with her to the door. The moment she opened it I could feel the heat radiating off the pavement outside and I resigned myself to a very unpleasant excursion outside.

***

In reparation for the incident that I will forever label the death march of summer 2013; Sara agreed to let me have the first use of the shower which I needed because we were both dripping with sweat by the time we had returned home. After my shower I returned to my room wrapped in a towel and got another eyeful of that strange smirk of hers. As I got dressed I could hear the sound of Sara starting the shower up again.

I felt a little refreshed thanks to my shower but being the lazy bastard that I am, I plopped down in the chair in front of my desk and computer. I decided that losing myself in the world of online FPS where getting shot multiple times didn't matter as long as you hid behind cover for five seconds afterwards, was a good way to pass the time.

It's hard to say how long I was playing before Sara came into my room because I kind of lost myself in the game. So it surprised me when Sara swatted my left hand away from my keyboard and squeezed herself between the desk and my chair. At first I just thought she was trying to annoy me by blocking my view of the monitor but when I started to complain she looked over her shoulder at me and flashed me that smirk I found so unsettling and clammed up. What she did next surprised me even more as Sara sat down in my lap and scooted herself against my chest before she replaced my left arm on the keyboard.

To say that I was shocked would be an understatement; here I was with my twin sister sitting in my lap and with my arms on either side of her while I sat there. Even though I wasn't actually holding her it felt like she had placed herself in my arms. The whole situation was far more intimate than any moment that we had ever shared before.

"Uh, Sara what are you doing?"

"I'm just hanging out with you."

"Don't you think that sitting in my lap is a little...weird?"

She actually laughed at me a little in response," I'm your twin sister Adam; I'm allowed to sit in your lap if I want."

"I'm not so sure about that," I replied with a healthy dose of skepticism in my voice.

Sara exhaled in annoyance before she spoke, "I don't see the problem; you can still play the game."

Sara leaned to the left slightly which let me view the monitor, but to get a good view I had to more or less rest my chin on her right shoulder which she seemed content to let me do. As one would expect having a woman in my lap was quite the distraction, especially with my head resting on her shoulder. The pleasant scent of her recently washed and still damp hair made my head swim. The pressure and warmth coming from her ass in my lap was even worse. I'm not going to pretend that my body didn't respond. The stiffness between my legs had not only to contend with the restriction of my pants and underwear but also the weight of my sister pressing down on it. This meant that Sara had to feel it but had so far chosen not to comment.

With these distractions I didn't last long in my digital firefight and soon I was witness to the fact that the concept of good sportsmanship was wasted on my generation as my corpse was tea bagged unmercifully by another player. With my character dead, my desire to play the game with my sister on my lap died as well.

Leaning back so that I was no longer resting against her I asked Sara, "Can you let me up Sara?"

"Hmmm...no," Sara said as she looked over her shoulder again and showed me a very knowing and pleased smile that seemed to say 'I know what's pressing against my butt right now'. "I'm really comfortable right now. I don't want to get up unless-".

"What," I cut in, desperate for a way out of my current predicament. I probably could have forced her off me but with my erection already jutting out I felt using any kind of force against her would just be too weird.

"Well I could be convinced to get up if my brother just held me for a little while."

"Held you?"

"Yeah, like hug me from behind."

Sara's request was exactly the kind of thing I was trying to avoid. "I don't know Sara, this situation is weird enough already."

"Oh, stop being such an idiot Adam! Were twins, we shared a womb for fucks sake; we're allowed to cuddle if we want to."

"I guess you're right," I said, not at all sounding convinced.

"Of course I am."

I knew it wasn't right but I couldn't bring myself to resist her as Sara took hold of my arms and moved them from the desk so that they rested against her midriff. "Hold me," I heard her whisper. Clearly just having my arms around her wasn't enough; she wanted to be held tightly.

I wasn't sure what I wanted, part of me wanted to surrender and give Sara what she wanted and crush her against me but I was conflicted. In the day that had passed since the incident in the park and the hug later that night it felt like my sister and our relationship had changed into something I didn't recognize and now it was getting confusing. My sister was an attractive woman and her amorous actions were pleasant to say the least but were siblings. Twins are supposed to be close but I don't think we're supposed be this close. "Please," I heard her whisper. This time I gave in and tightened my hold around her stomach as I pressed my chest against her back and rested my chin on her shoulder again. Sara sighed in contentment as I held her and I have to admit that I really enjoyed the feeling of having her in my arms even if I didn't think our behavior was appropriate for a brother and sister.

I don't know how long we sat there together, probably for only five minutes but it had felt like more time than that had passed before I released my hold on her and she finally got off of me. "Thank you Adam," she said sounding unsure as she left me alone in my room and wondering what was going on between us.

***

"How the hell did you get me to go to the park with you again?"

"You love me and you can't say no to me when I'm wearing shorts."

"Shut up," I said feeling a little embarrassed. In response Sara just smiled at me.

The next morning after the incident in my room I had been caught staring at her when Sara had come into the kitchen wearing a pretty short pair of shorts that put her slender legs on display. Ordinarily the incident probably wouldn't have been that bad but since it was still early in the morning I was left in that stupid fog I wake up in. So I couldn't tell you how long I had been staring before she called me out on it.

"I look good today, don't I?"

"Huh," I said as I looked up to see her looking at me.

"Don't I?" she asked again with a vicious smirk on her lips.

"Yeah, I guess," I responded sheepishly as I looked down at my breakfast.

"You're pretty cute when you try to pretend like you weren't looking your sister over."

I don't know what made me blush more: The fact that Sara had caught me ogling her or that she had just called me cute. Either way I kept my head hung low and stared at my bowl of cereal so that she couldn't see how red my face had become. This course of action had a disadvantage though, since I didn't notice how close Sara had moved towards me until she pulled my chair away from the kitchen table and sat in my lap for the second time in under twenty four hours. This time she sat on me with her legs dangling over the right side of my lap while she rested her right arm over my shoulder.