A Bride's Sexual Lingerie How To
A Bride's lingerie A guide on bridal lingerie and how to consummate your marriage while wearing it
As told to the author after a six hour marathon love making session at the Hotel Monte Carlo, 2001
Before I start this primer on wedding night sex and lingerie, I would like to clear up some misunderstandings that our lingerie ignorant culture has been spreading about for awhile now. Just because a lot of so called "Sex in the City" liberated American girls have "slept" with an average of ten men (college lesbian experiences do not count) before getting married, or are having their asses thonged by Victoria's Secret or Calvin Klein doesn't mean that American women know a rat's ass about lingerie! Furthermore, I recently heard some drunken idiot at a predictable Italian Irish wedding in New Jersey yell, "Throw us your garter belt!" during the over-rated garter tossing ceremony. No, I am not over reacting here - this misnomer is more common than you might think. The Internet is full of such inaccuracies, and it's not uncommon to find a myriad of wedding related web sites referring to the single garter worn on the leg as a "garter belt".
Lets get some things straight girls - brides don't throw "garter belts" - that in itself would be pretty bizarre visually, and I pray that she would have enough sense not to do that - because if she did, she would have to take off her entire wedding gown, get naked in front of everyone, and then throw it. It just doesn't make any sense. Besides, a naked bride is fine I guess, but one that is nude but retains her garter belt (with stockings, heels, and sans panties) is simply sublime in my book. What the bride throws is simply the garter that she wears under her dress on and her leg. A garter belt (or suspender belt for the Brits) on the other hand is a piece of elastic something - like a giant rubber band in lace and satin that helps keep stockings up, or is worn by a woman (or Mick Jagger, David Bowie, Rocky Horror Show aficionados) during sex as an accessory.
White - the color white - wearing things that are white, is a prerequisite in my opinion for things relating to weddings. No other color is acceptable. I don't care what era you are living in, or how many so-called "strides" the feminists have won - white is for weddings, period. Whether you have been a slut all your life, been divorced three times, or you are to have your hymen deflowered because you are an awkward virgin who is going to bleed on her wedding night - white should always be the color of choice for brides.
This travesty I have seen in America, especially amongst American movie starlets who wear black or red wedding gowns, but still have the audacity to wear white lingerie underneath. I can't phantom that. Weddings, as an institution have recently become a commercial enterprise, and a lot of the romanticism that used to be common has given way to plain gaudy design and materialism.
Although our culture has come to think that white somehow symbolizes the virginity and purity of the bride - this is wrong. Actually, it's a custom that started during the Victorian era. The pretentious unrealistic white dress became popular among the Victorian upper classes because one had to be wealthy to afford such a luxurious creation that it would only be worn one time. Moreover, white is traditionally the color associated with joy, and in my opinion the wedding ceremony, as well as the sexual act that follows should be of a joyous and celebratory nature. Oh, and I almost forgot, legend says that NOTHING black should be worn by the bride, else she risks becoming a widow real fast! This piece of advice also goes for wearing black lingerie under the wedding gown. A no no if there ever was one, especially with panties or thongs. Black, rather then white, makes a gal usually perspire more. The last thing a bride wants on her wedding night is a yeast infection, or to smell bad "down there" if the sex is to be spontaneous - like lifting up the dress and consummating in a flash. Wearing black lingerie during honeymoon sex, and for the rest of your sexual married life, is perfectly OK though and I actually encourage it when one wants to create a certain mood.
Married in white, You have chosen all right.
This progressive report is meant to be read by, brides to be, their grooms, or anyone interested in wedding lore, lingerie, or erotica dealing with weddings. It's only intended for mature open-minded persons of all walks of life that are seeking an alternative to the prudishness and corniness of the institutionalized wedding industrial complex. If you are not sexually savvy, but want to learn more, then by all means please read on, and contact us if you like. We welcome it, and encourage it! If you are a prude, and or, a feminist Nazi (some feminists are cool and understand what we are saying - Nazis on the other hand suck all around, but "femi-nazis" are even worse because they don't allow for beauty or joy in life or sexuality.), or an all around nasty person, then this article is not for you. One thing to be cautious about is that although this article is not meant to be looked on as pornography, (we prefer "instructional erotica") we nonetheless, since we are all adults here, will be speaking about topics that might be risqué or offensive to some. Yes, you will experience some frank language here, so you have been warned. Again, we mention that if any of this offends you, please don't read on.
However, if you are open minded, adventurous, and like to learn a thing or two, (and have fun and a hoot at the same time) then please join us!
Believe me brides, the wedding fashion design magnets don't care about your happiness, or if the marriage will last, they just want your money so they can keep on being the multi billion dollar industry they have become. Is it cynical to say this? Well, yes it is - but being that a grand percentage of marriages tend to end at a rapidly alarming pace we need to be realistic. Although I will never wish any couple to go through divorce.
This manuscript will strive to give couples and future brides an invitation to make their weddings and honeymoons into an erotic masterpiece that they will never forget while incorporating lingerie into the nuptial sexual act. Many of the brides or couples that I counsel (for free!) come back and thank me, usually telling me that they have had incredible sex because of chemistry, love, lust, and all that jazz, but also because of lingerie!
This information although as old as brides have been wearing white for weddings is not going to be found in an Emily Post etiquette book, Redbook, or Brides magazine. Instead it's common wedding night etiquette amongst brides that have a unique fashion and sexual savvy, or it has been passed down from enlightened mothers to daughters throughout the generations. I was fortunate to have a mother that was sexually advanced for her age. She taught my sisters and I that the most important thing was LOVE! A marriage without love is basically void, and it doesn't matter if both partners have slamming bodies, hot sex in bed, or lots of cash. Love as an essence and spiritual component is necessary for any marriage to survive.
I remember my wedding day fondly.
Also wedding night love making should be consummated while the groom is totally nude, and the bride is dressed in a wedding gown that is lifted to expose her genitalia, or she should be redressed and made up in the appropriate white lingerie.
On my wedding day I wore a beautiful white lace custom made corset with six garter straps on each side, and cups that while capable of being called "push up", also were designed to be let down so the breasts could hang. The designer of the corset was a gifted Argentine seamstress who learned her trade in Italy, and eventually became an instructor at New York City's famed Parson's School of Design. The corset she made for me was flawless, and since we worked closely together to come up with a final product, she made sure that it fit me very comfortably. She was open minded too, and she knew that the corset apart from being used as a foundation for the wedding gown, would be also used either during the wedding night consummation, or during the sexual marathons of the honeymoon. Suffice to say, although the corset hugged and squeezed my body with all the boning and structural elements, Manuela, made it so I could move around in it. I looked absolutely ravishing in it, and I wish I 'd snapped a picture of it when I was dressing at home. The scene in itself was erotic as my two half dressed sisters (one was six months pregnant and glowing), one totally nude bride's maid, a eighteen year old aspiring model cousin just in her panties, and my beaming mom, wearing a black bustier, also in a state of undress because she was pantyless, had not put on her stockings yet, and only managed to wear her heels as they all congregated around me - fussing to get the dammed but beautiful lingerie on me. Getting the wedding dress on was easier, but it wasn't as much fun as fitting into the corset. It was a sensuous experience that bordered on the incestuous - well, almost. Actually it was kind of spiritual also, because it opened up to an all female bonding that has since left our prudish society a long time ago. When was the last time a bunch of women gathered around in nakedness and semi dress and prepared a loved one for a ceremony of love, followed by a celebration of more affection with family, and lastly sealed with a sexual act both lustful and amorous?
I felt like an erotic princess at that moment, and if by some freak of nature they all decided to orally go down on me, I would've gladly let them. I know, that statement is way over the top, but.that was the degree of my sexual arousal at the moment!
If the bride so chooses to leave her wedding gown on, she should consummate the marriage either in a missionary position with gown lifted exposing her pubis, and stockinged gartered legs spread apart as far as possible - as not to interfere with the movements of the groom. It is also helpful and traditional that she wear her white opera pumps during consummation. This important factor gives the moment an aura of added romanticism or fetishism, (if you and your groom are so inclined in that direction) and it also helps the groom retain his balance by holding the heels so he can thrust harder and deeper while he is in the missionary. A groom can also use the stockings, garter, or brides suspenders to hold on to while he thrusts into his beautiful bride.
The other and more common position for consummation while the bride retains her gown is the traditional rear entry, or in vulgar terms, "doggy style" position. This is as old and classy as it gets, and numerous brides in Europe and America have been made love to while they took up this position. My mother always joked with my sisters and I that this is how I was conceived being the oldest child. Knowing the unique sexual dynamo that my mother was, and still is at sixty years "young", it's no surprise that when daddy and her married, and honeymooned in Bermuda, that it was in this sexual fashion that I was bought into the world. Being very open minded and creative myself, I have for many years visualized my "conception" vividly. Someday soon, during a mother and daughter quality time, I will gather enough courage to ask my mother how it actually happened, and knowing how she is, she would most probably volunteer to tell my sisters and I in the most vivid and graphic of details all with a chuckle, reflective glance to the air, and a phrase like, "that Cossack father of yours, boyo did he ever give me..."
For the time being, I remain with visions of a very beautiful twenty-year-old New York society girl, with short blond hair, pudgy nose, hunched over a balcony at the honeymoon suit of the Princess Hotel, Hamilton Bermuda. There overlooking the Atlantic Ocean at night, balmy breeze blowing, light house bell ringing, I see my mom Sally with her gown lifted up, long taut legs refined from field hockey at Vassar, now sheathed in French silk stockings, moaning like there was no tomorrow, being penetrated by my future dad as he drank directly from a bottle of the most expensive French champagne, passing it to my mom hunched over in ecstasy, a handsome dark White Russian émigré she had met two years previous in a trip to Spain she had hoped would've been like Hemingway said it would. I don't know if she ever found Spain to be like "Pappa Ernest" said it would, but I can assure you that on that warm Bermuda night, my own poppa's Russian sperm commingled with whatever New England stuff Sally's expensive breeding had to offer thus creating me! Although it wasn't a violent act it was arduous lovemaking nonetheless, and I bet you the whole hotel were probably wondering where those moans where coming from. Was some one being murdered? Far from it, I was being created!
Not only does rear entry affords a deeper penetration, it's specially suited for those couples that are in a sexual hurry and unfortunately can't wait for the wedding night to consummate their vows. If the couple is in an anxiously excited state and can't wait, rear entry provides a fast and convenient position that can be done during the wedding reception in the 'bridal party" room, broom closet at the catering hall, or after the wedding, in the Rolls (if privacy and finances permits) before taking pictures. Suffice to say, rear entry intercourse is perfectly suited for what in America they call a "quickie", or in the UK, a "shag". This happened to my cousin Violet right in the brides room at the Mohank Mansion as the guests partied a dozen feet away.
Wedding gown rear entry can be done in the following manner as it was done to my mom when I was conceived in Bermuda:
The nude groom takes his bride and he faces her back bringing her as close as possible, but letting him still have enough room to lift her gown. Naturally the bride is still wearing her wedding gown and it's optional whether she wants to leave on her veil. For added drama, I strongly recommend a girl wear the veil . This and other aspects of wedding night amour I tell certain girls that come into my boutique that I perceive to be of a highly sexual nature. Actually, I really don't volunteer anything, and instead they actually approach me sometimes after a number of fittings, or when they feel thoroughly at ease with me because we have built up a successful business as well as I sometimes become their sexual confidants as well as occasional casual lover. You'd be surprised how rampant is bi sexuality amongst rich white girls from New York City.
To all the girls that come into my boutique I always tell them to leave the veil on during sex. In addition, it's necessary to wear pumps if the bride is not tall. Not only do the pumps make the bride appear lovely, it also brings her vagina up at a closer level to the erect penis of the groom, thus ensuring a trouble free penetration. Even if the girl is a tall Amazon, I still recommend that she keep on her high heels during the wedding night lovemaking. Another important factor that can't be overlooked is that the groom must be very erect in his penis to carry this position out. A flaccid and weak penis not only can delay satisfaction of booth honeymooners, but it can also cause a state of angst and frustration because the groom is not hard enough to enter his bride. A groom wants his phallus to be hard enough to enter 1,2,3, and sure you can stimulate and tease the bride by rubbing your penis along her vagina and clitoris, but it must be sufficiently hard to avoid loosing time by playing with it to get it erect. As a woman I can tell you that the biggest sin a groom can commit on the wedding night is not the one about suffering from premature ejaculation, but making his bride wait while he gets hard. Don't drink too much grooms, it will affect your ability to get it up and shoot your ejaculate into your ecstatic and eager bride.
I recommend that the penis be very hard, sufficiently lubricated with saliva or a better quality lubricant other then the usual Vaseline or sticky K-Y Jelly. Astro Glide or the newer products by the K-Y Jelly makers are better, and if you must wear a condom, (traditionally you shouldn't) please I beg you, don't use Vaseline or oil based product that can tear the prophylactic. Use a water-based lubricant instead.
Unlike the majority of lingerie suppliers on the net, I also recommend vintage stockings, girdles and corsets, carefully preserved glimpses into an era of feminine glamour that is not around too much anymore. They are not modern these stockings, and they are made using old machinery - they are true collectors items to be cherished (and maybe worn for that 'special occasion'!).
It is imperative that the bride should be wearing stockings. Always stockings - that can be synthetic or silk - although silk stockings are preferred, they can be expensive and hard to find. As an aside, silk stockings are a delight to wear, but during wedding night sex they can get ripped and that is the last thing you want with a pair of hose you just spent fifty dollars on. There are no ifs ands or buts about this. If a bride doesn't wear stockings and instead wears panty hose then she is doing herself and her groom a disservice. Of course this is my opinion, but I know that many a couple that has come into my store thinks the same way I do about a bride wearing stockings. I guess it is acceptable if a bride wants to wear thigh highs that stay up without the use of garters or suspenders, they are still sexually arousing, but if a girl wants to be traditional she should be gartered with suspenders that are connected to a garter belt, basque, merry widow, bustier, or corset. This new trend that I have seen of girls wearing cheap panty hose under lovely two thousand dollar wedding gowns is just insane. Only in America, I guess. Besides, a good pair of stockings makes all types of legs look beautiful, and an aroused bride, visually stunning - while at the same time massaging a brides legs while she is physically active during her wedding or honeymoon fucking. Garter belts usually come with either four or six straps and the garter belt you choose will have a profound effect on the way you look and feel in your wedding gown and during sex. If you're choosing one to wear all day and you plan to have sex later on, the emphasis should be on comfort. Please go for a lightweight design, although look for a deep top for maximum tummy support. For wedding night sex were you would change into a new ensemble, the choice is much more varied. You could think about a bustier or corset for those romantic wedding night moments when you need some help staying upright! A bustier or corset with shoulder straps will give you even more support as your shoulders will then help to keep things in shape while you are penetrated by your groom. Top quality garter belts will have different length straps on the front, back, and sides. If the garter belt has four straps the back pair should be an inch or two longer than the front. If you've got six straps the back pair should still be longest: an inch longer than those at the side, which are in turn an inch longer than the ones at the front. Seamed stockings are the ultimate in chic and a joy to wear while getting pummeled, but you may find that the seams have a life of their own. To keep them straight, avoid garter belts that place the straps at the side and instead look for one which has them further round to the back. This is especially important if your legs are slim. Now for the stockings themselves. When pantyhose unfortunately came along they were seen as the comfortable, convenient alternative to stockings, but recent reports have revealed that they are also the cause of long-term health problems of which feminine itching is just the start. This is not something believe me you want happening on your wedding or honeymoon night! Don't worry, as the latest microfibre technology means that stockings can be every bit as comfortable as mundane pantyhose. If you ask me, panty hose were created by groups of gay women hating mad scientists in some German lab, or deranged feminists who were anti all things feminine.