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  • TV Temp: Kaley Cuoco

TV Temp: Kaley Cuoco

12

October 2009

The temp agency's next call came in mid-October; about two months sooner than I expected, given the pattern thus far. That should have been my first clue that things would be different this time.

Instead of being assigned to do temp work for a show, I had been chosen to be the temporary assistant to just one star of a show. These were different circumstances, but it was technically the same result. Once more, I would be spending time with the funny, beautiful star of one of my favorite shows.

"The Big Bang Theory" had become my main comedy of choice besides my NBC favorites, and now it was starting to really take off as its third season started. I didn't watch it right away when it premiered, yet my dad recommended it to me and I had become hooked after getting the DVDs not too long ago. Part of it was because it was a "nerd comedy" and another was due to how I shared characteristics with the ultra-annoying super genius Sheldon Cooper; which may or may not have reflected well on me.

As such, I certainly wouldn't have minded if I was selected to assist Jim Parsons, a.k.a. Sheldon. But assisting Kaley Cuoco, a.k.a. Penny, was hardly anything to sneeze at. For 10 days, I would be stepping in for her regular assistant and aid the gorgeous blonde actress on the set.

This made me quite proud for a number of reasons. Unlike when Jenna recommended me to "30 Rock" and Tina recommended me to "Mad Men" I doubted that I got this job because of an actress that I had sex with. Christina might have recommended me like the others, yet as far as I knew, she didn't have the connections to "The Big Bang Theory" that Jenna had with "30 Rock" and Tina had with "Mad Men."

So it seemed I got this job for skills that weren't hidden behind closed doors. What's more, I would actually be spending more one-on-one time helping Kaley than I did with Jenna, Tina or Christina. Even if it didn't....end up the way the other jobs had, it would still be a valuable assignment no matter what.

As such, I was in good spirits when I headed to the "Big Bang" set a few days later to meet Kaley. I was told that she was in her dressing room, which brought back a few memories of my last dressing room visit. However, Kaley's dressing room door was completely closed, so I put those thoughts aside like I usually tried to do in the daytime.

I was about to knock on the door, but my good mood and my memories of a popular "Big Bang" running gag inspired me to be more playful. I knocked quickly on Kaley's door three times and called out "Kaley" then did the same pattern twice more just like Sheldon always did when he knocked on Penny's door.

After the third "Kaley" the door was opened on cue just like on the show.

While Penny didn't always smile after Sheldon's door-knocking routine, Kaley Cuoco had a lovely smile to show me when she answered. I supposed that was one way in which me and Sheldon were different after all.

"I figured I'd get that out of the way off the bat," I offered as an explanation.

"No, that's cool. I almost thought you were really Jim at first," Kaley said to blur the Sheldon lines again. "But it's great to see you and meet you too."

She offered her hand and I gently shook it; briefly thinking that I was touching an actress sooner than usual. Yet I filed that away as she invited me inside for more professional purposes.

"I guess it's clear that you're a fan, first of all," Kaley figured out.

"I guess I did give it away. But I promise I'm the nice kind of fan. I know your real name is Kaley and not Penny, I have no interest in giving away spoilers and I won't touch Sheldon's spot on the couch."

"Well, I'm not the best person to lay down the law about that one. But I'm sure I can trust you anyway. I mean, I didn't hear anything about you touching Steve Carell or Tina Fey or Jon Hamm's spots."

There was room to debate about me touching Tina's spots, yet I got what she was really hinting at. "So you have seen my resume. I hope you don't hold it against me that I helped NBC comedy stars."

"Not those ones, that's for sure. I had more 'Mad Men' and Jon Hamm questions ready to pester you with anyway," Kaley joked, although I wondered if she was entirely kidding.

"Yes, he is that handsome in person," I preemptively assured. "But you should know that I mainly did tasks for the show, not him. The same went for the other shows, so this is really my first time assisting someone personally." At least the first time in which my clothes were on, I didn't say.

"If you didn't mess up some of the best shows on TV, I'm sure you can keep me from losing it for a few days," Kaley assured. "I'll need you on standby if I need something on the set, and since I looked up your number, I can call if I need something after work too."

I could take that a number of ways, but there was nothing flirty in her tone of voice; it was still just light and friendly like it had been since she answered the door. I could have been disappointed, given my past encounters and how I was already feeling comfortable and welcome around Kaley. Yet I gave her the benefit of the doubt and vowed to stay focused on the work, especially since it was for one person this time.

"I'll be ready for those calls, don't worry. Is there something you need during work right now? Just so I can get warmed up," I said while hoping I didn't sound needy.

"Well....you already did a pretty good Sheldon, so maybe I can bother you with something." Once she reached for her drawer, I noticed that there was an actual script in it. "You said you wouldn't leak spoilers, so I can test that and do a run through of my lines with you at the same time."

I had been flustered and surprised many times on a TV set before, yet this was in a new context. A less sexy context, but one that I didn't mind. "You'd like me to run through lines from the actual show with you?"

"That is what I said, sweetie. You don't have to repeat what I say after I assign you something. Just for future reference." She still didn't sound annoyed, so I assumed she was kind of teasing me with that warning. Plus the fact that she called me "sweetie" just like Penny usually does kept me in a pleased mood.

I was even more pleased once I helped Kaley run through her lines, especially since this was a Penny vs Sheldon heavy script. This was one where Penny slipped on her bathtub; for "lack of adhesive ducks" according to Sheldon; and driving-phobic Sheldon actually had to drive her. So I got to act out scenes with Kaley that would undoubtedly make fans roll over when she acted this out with Jim on the air. I even got to sing a round of their sick song "Soft Kitty" at the end to cap it all off.

"You know, it's no accident that I can do the knock and sing Soft Kitty too," I commented at the end. "Sometimes I actually feel like Sheldon. I'm not always social, I can talk over people's heads, I probably have some kind of OCD, I have to be dragged into doing new things and I can have a pretty inflexible schedule."

Once I realized these faults weren't good things to mention to a boss, I backtracked. "Not that I'm like that at work at all! I'm completely reliable when I'm ordered to be, trust me. Plus I'm not thin or lanky and I don't understand any science stuff, so I'm not entirely like him."

"So you're just a minor Sheldon, then. Well, that should be child's play for me to handle by now," Kaley reasoned.

"Right. I mean, you battling the major Sheldon is the best part of the show. And that's going to be even clearer after this episode airs," I praised.

"Thanks....that makes it clearer I'm going to like 'battling' minor Sheldon too," Kaley joked as she headed to her door. "Can he walk me to the set before we both get to work?" He did walk Kaley and then did whatever else she asked of him for the next week.

Assisting one person and taking care of their specific tasks is different than doing general work on a set. But while it was more involved, I had enough experience and expertise to get it done. I had to pick up things sometimes, organize some of Kaley's fan mail and other items, and even had to drop off a thing or two at her house. Yet I did my jobs without any trouble, or at least without any trouble that I couldn't handle.

Either way, Kaley was thankful for my efforts. She usually found time to talk to me before and after her time on set; whether we had to go over work or not. I was able to attend a few tapings and laugh along with the studio audience; although the studio audience hadn't ran through some of the lines beforehand.

It was enough of a fun experience that I almost did forget about what was missing; at least compared to my last three jobs. It was ironic since I spent more time with Kaley than the others, and I was just as attracted to her on and off camera as I was with them. However, I made myself not dwell on what hadn't happened and focused on the good stuff that did happen.

But that got harder when my last days on the job came closer. I didn't bring anything up to Kaley so as to avoid any awkward talks. Yet Kaley didn't do the same on my next-to-last night in the studio.

"So, you won't get to see me head home anymore after tomorrow," she stated after she finished work and got back into her regular clothes. "Are you okay with that?"

"Oh...yeah, I'll be fine. I've gotten used to this sort of ending by now. But I'm still going to end on my best behavior and not leave a mess for you before I go," I promised.

"I know you won't," she reminded me. "You know, this is really your last full day here. We should celebrate all the good ones you had before then."

"We should?" I asked while my mind was still clean.

"Yeah, why not? You can come by the house and we'll have a proper goodbye for you! If you're free, of course."

"Well...even if I wasn't, how could I pass up?" I admitted. "But I am free, so don't worry."

"Great! So you can just follow me home, then!" she summed up in a cheery tone. I just nodded, since I didn't know what tone to use or to feel.

By now, I wasn't naïve enough to forget what this could set me up for, yet I still tried to will myself not to expect it or hope for it. Even after Kaley invited me to her house and offered to give me a goodbye and had been nothing but tempting for over a week. Plus unlike Jenna, Tina and Christina, she wasn't married, engaged or going through a divorce. Yet I once again used my super-human ability to bury these thoughts as I headed to her home.

Other than that, all was normal as I went into her living room. I had been here a few times already, although this time it wasn't to drop something off. "You want a drink?" Kaley offered as I made my way to her couch.

"Actually, I probably shouldn't. I still need to drive home and all, and I'd rather not take any chances." In addition, I didn't want alcohol to cloud things should they 'develop' after all. But I didn't need to say that for Kaley to get the hint, so she just got me a soda.

"What are you going to do after tomorrow?" Kaley asked as she sat down with me. "Are you going to get more temp work, or focus on your freelance stuff and book ideas?"

"I've been doing all of it so far, and it's turned out pretty well," I answered. "Maybe not as well as I'd like sometimes, but I make enough and do enough to get me through. Plus I get to be around my favorite TV people every several months as a bonus."

"That still includes me, right? I didn't knock myself too far down your list, did I?" Kaley inquired.

"Actually, you stayed pretty steady. You might even go up a few spots in my next review."

"Considering the company I'm in, that would be something," she declared. "I love my Big Bang guys, but you've worked with a lot of people I'd kill to work with for a few days."

"Well, I only did tasks on the set and did a few personal things. I didn't work for any of them personally, like I did with you. So that makes this experience all the more unique. And kind of special," I added at the end to better show my appreciation.

"Aw, I'm glad you feel that way, sweetie. You deserve to with what a help you've been." Those words didn't need any backing up, yet she did it anyway with a brief peck on my cheek.

I still had room to dismiss this as her being affectionate and just wanting nothing more than to show her thanks. So I smiled bashfully as my only response and reached to drink from my soda, in hopes that would cool me down too.

"Well....I'm not wiping my face and whining about germs, so there's more proof I'm not Sheldon!" I tried to joke.

"You've got me there. He would have hated that....I'm guessing you didn't," Kaley predicted. Since she was actually bringing that back up, and seeming to want an answer, my resistance to getting my hopes up started to crumble. So I decided to test the waters a bit.

"No....only a wackadoodle like Sheldon would have hated you doing that," I got out. "Of course, a lot of fanfic writers have him acting differently."

"So....by those standards, do you want to be like him?" Kaley asked as she inched closer. "If you want to find out, I wouldn't object to a little....experiment."

I was becoming more of an expert in this specific field. And now I knew I was ready to find more data.

I closed the gap and zeroed into Kaley's bright green eyes as my lips zeroed in onto hers. She closed her eyes a second after our lips connected, so I finally closed mine and slipped into my sex mode. By now this might have been old hat, yet it became clear to me each time out that every 'experiment' was different in its own way. And since this was a different setting, I really could relax, take my time and just savor kissing Kaley without rushing into the rest of it.

It took a minute or two of slow, sweet kisses before Kaley put her arms around my neck and started to use her lips and tongue more vigorously. I responded by breaking my lips away and started to glide them over what I hoped were sensitive parts of her neck. Her coos suggested I was on the right track, so I started sucking and nibbling on those parts to be sure.

Once she confirmed it with her pleased noises, I was about set to see what other sensitive parts there were on her body. But then I remembered another way that this could be different from the other times. "Do you want to keep going in the bedroom?"

"Uh huh...let's go while I can still walk there," she agreed. I helped her get off the couch and she led me to her bedroom; the first bedroom I would actually be in since my temp career started.

Once we got in and stood right besides her bed, I moved to pick up where I left off until Kaley stopped me. "You know, you've been attending to my needs from the start. I already know you'll be quite good at....keeping that up in here. So I'd like to start here by servicing you for once."

Kaley started unbuttoning my shirt before I could try to say it wasn't necessary. After undoing the buttons, her hands stayed above my pants as she started kissing down my chest and I threw the shirt off myself. By the time she got down to her knees, my zipper was already undone and she was at work on my belt.

I steeled myself to somehow last long again while a sexy actress was romancing me. But this was the first time that one was starting off with a blowjob, so I would be put to the test a bit faster. Kaley started her test by pulling my pants and underwear down to my ankles, studying my cock as she began to brush it with her left hand, and then finally sliding her lips slowly down my head.

She suckled the head and then brushed the underside of it with her tongue before she steadily went deeper down the shaft. Then she stopped suckling and just kept it in her mouth as her tongue did all the work for a little while. Eventually she went back and forth between bobbing up and down, using her lips and using her tongue in no particular order.

I was too busy throwing my head back in awe to look down at her as much as I wanted. But once I steadied myself to see her at work, I noticed that she was starting to work on pulling her blouse up as well. Kaley broke from my dick just long enough to get her blouse off, then returned to work with only a black bra covering her chest; or at least some of it.

I didn't even have that much time to gaze down at her open cleavage before I saw her hands reaching towards her skirt. She was now disrobing that as well while she sucked me off, pulling the skirt down far enough to show off her black panties and the round, perky backside that they tried to cover.

"Oh come on! How am I supposed to last seeing that?" I asked with fake anger once I could talk. At that point Kaley pulled her mouth away to talk back. "You don't have to, you know. We've got all night and I'm in no hurry," she pointed out as her fingers stroked the tip of my dick. "Far as I'm concerned, you can cum as often and as hard and as long as you want."

She set out to prove it by putting her mouth back on me and sliding it up and down my cock with growing speed. Now freed from the burden of having to last until the very end, I let my guard down and fully gave in. After that happened, it was only a matter of 10 seconds; still longer than I expected; before I came as hard as Kaley wanted.

I looked back down to see Kaley keep her mouth on me as I exploded; which sadly made me shut my eyes as my ecstasy got more intense. I reopened them in time to see Kaley pop off me and then lick me clean of whatever she didn't swallow.

Now I was even more relieved that I was near a bed this time, as I fell nearly face first on it after Kaley got out of the way. I did manage to roll over and inch towards the front of the bed while Kaley started climbing on to join me. Finally she positioned herself to lay next to my right side as I rested my head on the wall.

My eyes could still work, however, and I now used them to take in how Kaley's mostly naked body was snuggled against me. After being with Christina, any thinner girl would look more like a stick figure by comparison, so it was unfair to compare Kaley to her. While she was less fuller figured, her bra-covered breasts looked more than full enough, as did the ass that her very well defined curves led to. She was a blond bombshell in every sense of the word.

"Well....with this view, it shouldn't take me that long to get ready again," I assured Kaley. "But I should keep myself busy to pass the time."

With that clear setup, Kaley was ready for me to kiss her again as we lay on our sides. Perhaps kissing her after she swallowed me off wasn't the most advisable move. But I multitasked by trailing my hand down her waist towards her curved hip, before gliding it over to the back of her panties. I pulled it slightly down to get a feel of her bared ass, only to move my hand back as I sat up and had Kaley sit up with me.

She seemed confused that I was sending my hand up her body and not further down. Yet she went along with it as I trailed my mouth down her chest to make up for it. With her sitting up against the wall, I had an even closer view of her cleavage than I did when she was on her knees. This time I was able to fully take advantage as I put my face in between her tits and started licking and sucking.

I kissed the bare side of her left breast before moving over to kiss the bra cup covering the rest of it. I found her nipple and started to play around with it despite how it was still covered. Yet Kaley could feel my hands going to the back of her bra and was reassured that her nipple wouldn't be covered for long.

Once it was unhooked, I pulled down the cup with my mouth and let the rest of the bra fall as I attacked her bare breasts. It was easier to get to all her flesh faster, compared to Christina's tits, yet the girth of Kaley's C-cups did make it hard to be 100% thorough. But neither of us was complaining right now.

12
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