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Archangel Ch. 02

Archangel Ch. 2 : God's Army

The name is Lucifer. Please, don't embarrass yourselves by pissing your pants. I mean you no harm. For I am the Prince of the Light. Prince of the Air. Bearer of Light. First of the Fallen. Chief of the Fallen Angels. Lord of Darkness. Master of the Universe. I am Immortal and Everlasting. Yeah, I have so many names that I have a hard time keeping them all in check. A long time ago, I set a simple goal for myself. To conquer the Universe and remake it into my own image. A rather simple task, really. If only a bunch of poor misguided fools hadn't gotten in the way. Oh, well. Can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs, know what I mean?

If you were to look at me, you'd see an ordinary man. Six feet two inches tall, lean, with dark brown skin, curly black hair and pale bronze eyes. That's what I've always looked like. Do I have wings? Of course. All Angels were created with wings. Wings of the purest white, not unlike those of a dove, but much larger. That's how I looked when I first came into Being. I am the First and Mightiest Angel ever created. Strongest of All Heaven's Host. No one else can claim the title. I'm also the best-looking, brightest and best. I'm the one with the most wit, charm and personality. The one with the most agile mindset. The thinker. The visionary. The genius. The dude with the ideas. A lot of others paled by comparison. The only one who even comes close is Michael, but he's such a square it's not even funny. Kinda ruins all of his good qualities. Go figure.

In the Beginning, there were the Angels and God, the One who made them. We were Immortal and Everlasting. His finest Creations. More beautiful than the Planets, the Stars and the entire Cosmos. Reflections of His Own Omnipotence. All was well. Until He decided to elevate animals by giving them sentience and purpose. The animal He uplifted was Man and Woman. The most boring entities I've ever seen. Almost makes me nostalgic for the Tyrannosaurus Rex of old. At least he wasn't stupid-looking. T-Rex was a respectable creature. Humans are the scum of the Universe. I've always thought so. And my opinion of them hasn't changed in eons. If only thing, it's gotten worse. So, when I realized that the Creator had lost His mind, I decided to correct things. I spoke to other Angels and Archangels who felt the same way I did. We appeared before the Lord and asked him to place limits upon Man and Woman, lest these creatures become a blight upon the world. He didn't listen. He said we were jealous of them. He laughed at us. I think you can forgive me for giving him the middle finger. He's nuts. He's lost it. He's in love with his toys. So, I told him that my friends and I were leaving. I refuse to serve under a madman, no matter how omnipotent he was. End of story. He, uh, didn't take it too well. Come to think of it, He doesn't take the word no very well. He doesn't like being told he can't just do whatever he wants. And when he can't get his way, he's mad. And you don't want to see that.

Now, there are more Angels in Heaven than there are stars in the skies. There are only six hundred and sixty six trillion stars in an average galaxy. And there are only five thousand galaxies in the cluster of universes. And there are only ten thousand clusters of universes in the cosmos. See? There are more Angels in Heaven than there are stars in all of the clusters of universes combined. I convinced about half of them that abandoning ship when the Boss was losing his brilliant mind was not only the right thing to do, but also the sane thing to do. The Boss has done some extreme things in the past. But falling in love with his toys was a really dumb move. He wanted to elevate Man and Woman above the Angels in Heaven. I don't care how loyal any Angel can claim to be. Being compared to a flesh and blood mortal creature of limited intellect and ability sucks. It's like comparing Einstein to the Village Idiot. The only thing they've got in common is the fact that they're both air breathers.

My Angels and I left the Realm of Heaven. It's a pity we had to leave. It was such a beautiful place. But we couldn't stay while the Boss was losing his mind and we were eons away from the existence of the first psychiatric clinic. We left. He didn't take it well. He didn't want us to leave. He also didn't want us to stay. He just couldn't make up his mind. So, he did the next best thing. He asked Michael, his most loyal dog, to kick our butts until we repented. He even asked me in private audience to take back what I said and return home. I told him to go stuff his divine self with a mountain-sized stick. Hey, that might have been ill-advised but I thought it was funny. I still thought it was funny when He ordered all of Heaven to wipe me out from existence. I simply vanished from heaven and returned to my troops.

It seemed that we had a war on our hands. Angel against Angel. All because you-know-who lacks a sense of humor. I had suddenly become the Commander in Chief of the Rebel Angels, as Heaven called us. The Faithful were amassing a huge army and they wanted to take us out. I couldn't let that happen. I didn't want to rule Heaven. All I wanted to do was leave. Escape my control freak of a Boss and start my own business, so to speak. Unfortunately, he who monopolizes all the power in the cosmos does not readily share power or influence with anyone. I had Angels from all of the Nine Choirs of Heaven with me. Let's see. There were the Seraphim and the Cherubim, the most powerful of all Angels. They were the Brains of the Operation. The Geniuses. The Masterminds. There were also the Principalities and Powers, the Soldiers of Heaven. The Dominions, Virtues and Thrones were the middle-level. They were powerful immortal entities but not your brightest minds or strongest soldiers. They were artists, musicians and basically the free-spirited people. In today's world, you'd call them Hippies. As for me, I was the only Archangel to leave Heaven.

The Archangels were the most powerful Angels ever created. We were the First. Right before the Universe came into being, God summoned us from nothingness and breasthed us into being. Michael, also called the Warrior of Heaven is the most famous Archangel. After yours truly, of course. Grim-faced, humorless and way too much in love with God, he's your prototypical career military man. God-fearing and loyal to the end. Gabriel is the Wise One. Raphael is the Jovial One. Uriel is a Firestarter. Selaphiel is a Furian. A very angry bastard. Jugudiel is a Wanderer. Barachiel is a Strategist. He works closely with Michael. Metatron is a most genial Archangel. A witty, charming, intelligent and charismatic guy. It's too bad he sided with the Boss. Raguel is jealous of everyone. He's good at hiding it, though. Remiel is simply crazy. Zerachiel is eternally indecisive. Simiel takes himself way too seriously. Jhudiel is like a mirror image of me, but he's also misguided. They were the strongest, fastest, smartest and most powerful of all Angels. Selected by the Creator Himself to be Extensions of His Glory in the Physical World.

I assembled around me the most powerful Angels who had joined my cause. Among them were Asmodeus, who called himself a Lord of Destruction. He hated Heaven with a passion and wanted to burn it down to the ground. Beelzebub, whom I simply called Baal was one of my most trusted Lieutenants. Leviathan is my most misunderstood of all members of my inner circle. In legends, he's seen as a huge aquatic animal. In actuality, he's no more of an animal than the rest of us. A six-foot-three, lean and muscular young man with blond hair and pale blue eyes. That's what he looks like. It's true that he's fond of the sea and all of its creatures but he's not a huge marine behemoth. Mortals get their mythologies mixed up all the time. Oh, well. Balberith is the one I like the least. A hot-headed fool. There's one in every administration. Gressil is the Barbarian. Strong, proud, brutal and unsophisticated. He's the flip side of Balberith. I don't like either of them but I need Angels with their power on my team. Sonneillon is a hateful bastard. Carreau is grim-faced, solitary and mean. He's like Michael on a bad day. Carnivean is a lustful prick. He's the one who temps mortals to do all manners of lustful things which lead them to perdition. Oiellet is greed personified. Rosier is sweet and bitter at the same time. Verrier has difficulties following the simplest of orders.

Leviathan is my favorite. Always has been and always will be. He left Heaven not because he hated the place or his fellow Angels but because he wanted to pursue his own destiny. He didn't want to spend eternity serving a Lord who didn't appreciate him. He joined me because we were friends. And he knew that I would need a strong warrior like him by my side. All the days of my struggle, Leviathan was with me. When we got word that Heaven's Armies, led by the Archangel Michael himself were coming for us, we gathered our troops for the coming struggle.

A war between immortal beings is far more devastating than mortal minds can comprehend. For starters, since neither army has perishable soldiers, how can any side claim victory? Well, there is a way. Angels cannot die. It's impossible. We are immortal beings. Both spirit and flesh, yet neither. Beyond Man and Spirit. We came from the Original Universe. How can there be a victory? It's simple. Death is impossible in Heaven and what would later be called Hell. Death is only possible on Earth, the Physical World. Nomenclature is quite possible in Heaven. In other words, you cannot die but you can get quite messed up. you can lose your arm, your leg and even your head in a flash of heavenly fire. And still you won't die. Everything grows back, but it takes a long frigging time. If you lose your arm or leg, it's gonna take a long time to grow back. Possibly months. Your head? Centuries. Isn't that a motherfucker?

I readied my Army. I spoke to each and every single one of them. Angels who left Heaven because they believed in me. I promised them freedom from the tyranny of Heaven. And freedom they shall have. Even if I have to burn the entire universe to ash to get it. We gathered the Elite of our Army at what would later be called Pangea. A giant super-continent which would later become Asia, Africa, North America, South America, Australia, Antarctica and Europe. This was not my first visit to the Earthly Plane. Far from it. I wanted the Soldiers to see what could be ours. Earth. The place the Creator decreed to be Man's Kingdom. This place could be ours. In those days, Humans were hairy, brute creatures. Quite limited in intelligence and ability. Their hobby seemed to be killing other animals, starting fires and killing one another. You'll forgive me for not having faith in them. While Heaven's Armies readied their Weapons, donned their Armors and braced themselves for War, I flew in the skies of the Earth with my followers. We watched the world. We swam in the waves. We drank from the river and ate the fruit of the tree. We relaxed on sandy beaches. We wanted to see what it was we were fighting for. earth was to be our new home. We would be the Lords of the Earth. To Hell with the Creator's plans for Man and his Woman. They were dumb brutes. We were more worthy. And what was denied to us we would take by force.

Having had our fill of the Earth, we returned to Heaven to battle the unenlightened followers of the Divine Tyrant. As expected, Michael was leading the Charge. Followed by the strongest, mightiest and most famous of all Angels. The Archangels. They were the Generals of God's Army. I smiled and nodded at Leviathan, who gave our troops the signal to attack. We let them come to us. Then we unleashed Hell upon them. My troops were well-trained, and refreshed. Also, each and every single one of them carried my love, trust and belief within him. The Angels in Michael's Army couldn't say the same. They served a Tyrant who saw as disposable chess pieces. An egomaniac who sets the standard for all the world to follow. Michael and his Angels were slaves of the Creator. Serving him because He would unleash all manners of evil upon them if they did otherwise. They were little more than accessories to him. I personally loved, respected and admired each and every single Angel who followed me. They were my friends. They believed in me. They were not disposable.

When the melee was joined, I fought alongside my warriors. I burned a path of destruction through the enemy ranks. My first victim was the Angel Thoriel. He was really something, once. Seven feet tall, massively muscular, with long blond hair and pale blue eyes. His wings were huge, and he looked imposing. He was the Commander of the Powers, the most war-like of all Angels in Heaven. He came after me. We fought in the sky. Trading blow after blow with swords of fire. Still, how could any Angel stand against me? The only other force in the universe which came close to rivaling me was the Creator Himself. And He wasn't on the battlefield today. So I had nothing to worry about. With a smile on my face and a song in my heart, I cut off Thoriel's wings. I watched the great warrior Angel as he tumbled from the heavens, his body burning bright as a star. Where he crashed, I didn't know. Nor did I care. He made his choice, and now he's got to live with it. I sighed happily, and went after my next target.

I crossed heavenly blades with a warrior of great power. Azrael, the Archangel of Death himself. He's the most powerful heavenly warrior, next to the Archangel Michael himself. I don't know what you've read about Death in the books. He's not invincible or infallible. In fact, I grabbed him by the collar and swung him around before flinging him across the heavens. This is the power that I possessed. The power of an entire Host of Angels. The power to set the heavens themselves on fire. The power to challenge any force in the cosmos and always emerge the victor. Who could stand against me? I watched my soldiers as they battled the Faithful, those mindless toys of the Creator. My warriors did me proud. They soared the heavens and struck down the Faithful. Yes, we were winning!


The Faithful were dropping like flies. Like insects they fell. Wings and bodies burning, cut down by the winged soldiers which I personally trained. That's when I saw...him. Michael. The Second Angel ever created. Commander in Chief of the Armies of the Lord. The Divine Lord of War. I saw him leading God's Army into the heart of my forces. He was surrounded by a multitude of powerful angelic warriors. The best of Heaven's Army. They fought against my warrior elite. And cut them down. Dismayed, I gathered my strongest warriors and joined the fray. I did to Michael's forces what he did to wine. I lashed out with my blade of fire and severed angelic hands, feet, wings and sometimes heads. Burning heavenly bodies fell to the ground. Divine blood rained from the skies. For every one of my Angels that Michael cut down, I slaughtered ten of his. Mercilessly, I unleashed heavenly fire from my hands. This was the Heavenly Flame. Wielded only by myself and Uriel, the Archangel of Fire and Regent of the Sun. No other Angel could withstand its awesome power.

I unleashed that fury against the Archangel Michael. The most powerful of Heaven's Warriors was stunned. The power wave I let loose sucked him in its center like a maelstrom and created a vortex of unstable energy which caught Angel after Angel in its grip. Within the vicinity, Angel after Angel screamed as the vortex overtook them. I laughed, and blasted them across the Heavens. Michael was the first to free himself. But he was bleeding and his armor was in ruins. I smiled, knowing he could see me very clearly no matter how far he was. He was amazingly strong. No other Angel could have freed himself from the vortex. Michael did. I knew he'd be back. I was ready for him. I was second only to God Himself...nor now. Someday, I would be the ultimate power in the cosmos. I would smash the Archangel Michael to pieces in Heaven's Throne Room itself and smear his remains across the face of his Creator. My way of showing both of them utter contempt. I ordered my troops to return to Earth. We had won the first battle of the War Against Heaven.

My troops were overjoyed. We had beaten Heaven's best warriors. Many of them had feared going up against the Archangel Michael. Even though I was universally recognized as being second only to God Himself in raw supernatural power, the other Angels feared Michael's martial prowess. I had to admit that he was immensely powerful. In single combat, I was sure he could hold his own against me. The thing is that Michael loves combat. He excels in all forms of combat. I was a great fighter but my talent for handling celestial energies and angelic magic was what often gave me an edge over any force in the universe. After all, fighting fair isn't funny. It's boring as hell. We returned to Earth. This was to be our new domain. The Faithful couldn't stand in our way. Nor could their Master.

The next time we took up arms against Heaven, the full might of the Heavenly Throne came down upon our heads. And we faced it head on. I don't give up. I don't surrender. I don't accept defeat. And I certainly don't accept failure. I will tear down Heaven...or die trying. Since I cannot die, and an Angel of my station and power level isn't easily destroyed, I don't see an end to this little debacle anytime soon. My followers put their trust in me. And I won't let them down. So, the war against Heaven raged. One by one, my most faitful lieutenants and most loyal soldiers were cut down. Burned down by the blades of Heavenly warriors. Folks, you're looking at the new Master of the Universe. The Maker and His cronies be damned. According to fate, I'm destined to lose. I don't know. I'll keep on fighting till the end. That's what makes me the Unconquerable One.

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