The Palace Pt. 13

Bishkur found time for me the very next morning.

- "There was much more that you wanted to say to me, yesterday." he said.

- "You were a little busy." I reminded him. "But I do have some questions."

- "Please." he said, inviting me to sit. Nanka served us fruit juice, and then left us alone. She might have been listening from the next room, but that didn't bother me.

- "I'm wondering about yesterday. My role in it, particularly."

- "You were instrumental to our success." said Bishkur.

- "I didn't do anything that you couldn't have done. Speaking of which: why didn't you?" In retrospect, I didn't find my own actions all that heroic. Any idiot could have followed Panys and done as instructed.

- "Lead the attack myself? I couldn't, Carrach. My mother and Opkor had their spies following me everywhere. My guards, my clerks ... even some of the engineers and water inspectors. They were all reporting my every move."

"That is why I went to visit General Vanzahd several times. We had private discussions. My mother was suspicious, but even she couldn't insist that I take one of her spies into a private meeting with a Governor."

"If I had tried to go outside the Palace, to meet with the soldiers ... well, that was why Notroh was assigned to me. And that is the reason why you were so essential. I kept mother, Opkor, and Captain Danud occupied -"

- "How?" I asked.

- "Oh, I spun them a tale about needing more money for the water project - which I do. I just kept talking, hoping that you would arrive."

- "It was more Panys than me." I said. "Who is he?"

Bishkur nodded. "You remember how I told you about the male lover my mother found for me?"

- "I thought she had him killed?"

- "She did. He was Panys' cousin. My mother overlooked that little detail. Panys knew exactly what had happened. When we had the opportunity to talk, he let me know who he was, and that he would stand by me in need."

- "But - how could you communicate with him?" I asked. "Panys was guarding or escorting me, and Notroh was always there."

- "I got messages to him through a mutual friend. A friend of yours, as it happens."

- "Mine?" I was confused. I had no friends at the Palace. "Nanka?"

- "No." said Bishkur. "Serim."

- "Serim? The beggar at the gate?"

- "Panys is married to his sister. A lovely girl. The rest of the family pooled their resources to provide a bit of education and a dowry, so that she could marry a man from a higher social class. Panys admits that he would have married her for her beauty alone." said Bishkur.

- "Serim? I can't believe it."

- "A clever man." said the Emperor. "By coincidence, both you and I got into the habit of giving him money. Since you always wore a hood, he was able to put two and two together. He is not shy, either. It was Serim who suggested that I approach Panys."

- "You were lucky. Very lucky." I said.

- "Perhaps. But some say that no good deed goes unrewarded."

- "May I ask something else?"

- "Go ahead." said Bishkur.

- "What will happen to your mother?"

- "I will not kill her, Carrach. I promised her that much. There was no reason for me to lie."

I nodded. Bishkur watched me.

"I know that expression." he said. "There is something else you wish to say."

- "I don't know where to start." I said.

- "Anywhere. You need not couch your thoughts in polite terms. There is no need for pretence between us, Carrach." said the Emperor.

- "That's my problem." I said. "You're the only person I tell the truth to. I lie to everyone else. My life is an imposture."

He nodded. "It is difficult for you; I know that. It must wear on you." Bishkur did know: he had had to pretend around his mother and her agents for years.

- "No one in their right mind would feel sorry for me." I said. "Being asked to sleep with beautiful concubines ... it's hardly a fate worse than death. But ... it's different now."

- "Bereyar?" he guessed.

I could only nod.

- "You have fallen in love with her." he said. It wasn't a question. "I thought this might happen."

- "You expected this?"

- "Of course." he said. "I told you that she was intelligent, and kind, and lovely. What could be more natural than Bereyar being drawn to someone equally kind and intelligent?"

- "Except that it's a lie." I pointed out. "I'm not who she thinks I am."

- "Are you not?" he asked.

- "She thinks I'm you!"

- "She does not know me. I met her only once, and we did not converse directly even then. All she saw was my face - which is near-identical to yours. She is in love with you, Carrach."

- "She thinks that I'm the Emperor!"

- "Are you not?" he asked, quietly.

- "What? You're the Emperor." I said.

- "Am I?"

- "Of course you are." I said. "I don't understand what you mean."

Bishkur stood up, but motioned to me to remain sitting.

- "I am not a whole Emperor, Carrach. I can do good things for the capital, and for the Empire. But I cannot marry -"

- "You will." I said. "Eventually, if not soon."

- "Thank you." he said. "But I do not share your optimism. I must be a realist. Now consider this from my perspective. You do what I cannot, Carrach. You lift a burden from my shoulders."

- "I wouldn't call what I've been doing a 'burden'." I said.

- "Having sex? Surely not. But it is a problem for me - which you solve." he said. "And it is a hardship for you, in the sense that you must pretend to be me. You have to be constantly on your guard, surrounded by people who cannot learn your secret."

"I understand how lonely that can be, Carrach."

- "I know you do." I bowed my head.

- "Yet I am asking you to continue." he said. "Hear me out: yes, I want you to visit the concubines on my behalf. And I want you to marry and sire children in my place. But I ask even more. I want you to help me rule."

- "Pardon?" I wasn't sure that I had heard him correctly.

- "Are you not more comfortable around people who know the secret, Carrach? You trust me, do you not? And now you know that you can trust Nanka, and Panys."

"Do you not see? It is exactly the same for me."

I hadn't seen it. I was so wrapped up in my own difficulties, that I couldn't realize how our positions were mirror images. Bishkur had lived in fear that his own mother would kill him. He had no one to trust, to confide in. And he had to pretend.

- "Is that why you trusted me, so soon?" I asked.

- "I had to trust someone. But I liked you from the start. For an impostor, you are remarkably honest. You are not obsessed with your own ambitions. We share many similar interests - and values." he said. "And we know each other's secret. That is tremendously important. I meant what I said: there is no pretence between us."

"Is that not at the heart of your problem with Bereyar?"

- "I can't love her and lie to her at the same time." I said.

- "Then we will tell her the truth." said Bishkur.

- "But what if she ... wait - did you say we?"

- "I did. I was the one who contracted the marriage, with her father. I lied to her, too."

- "But - what if she ... "

- "You cannot go on lying to her, Carrach. You said this yourself. We have no choice. We can only tell her the truth, and then deal with the consequences." he said.

He was right. We couldn't go back. We could only go forward, even if it wrecked everything. I could lose Bereyar; Bishkur could lose even more.

- "You're very brave." I said.

- "Realism is not the same as courage." he said.

We couldn't very well walk through the Palace together. Instead, Panys went to Bereyar, and brought her to Bishkur's private chambers. The Emperor left me to wait for her, alone.

I had a few moments to think of what I would say, which meant, of course, that when she arrived, I had no idea whatsoever of what I was going to do.

She had never seen these rooms before, and was naturally curious. But Bereyar was also incredibly sensitive to my moods, and my body language. I don't know how she did it.

- "Is something ... wrong?" she asked.

- "Maybe you should sit down." I told her.

I didn't know where to begin. I just leapt off a cliff.

"Bereyar, I have something to tell you."

- "Yes?" she said.

- "I'm not who you think I am." I said. "I'm ..." This was going to be difficult. Perhaps it would be better simply to show her. "Bishkur?" I called. "Could you come out here?"

It was cruel. But it was quick.

Bereyar saw the two of us standing side by side. Her eyes switched from me, to Bishkur, and then back and forth. Her mouth was working, soundlessly. Then she found her voice.

- "How ..? Who is this?" she said, indicating Bishkur.

- "Highness," said Bishkur, "we are going to tell you the whole story. It is a long tale. We ask only that you reserve judgment until you have heard it all."

Bereyar might have been in shock. She nodded. Bishkur drew up chairs for the two of us, and we sat down facing her. Her eyes were still moving, as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing.

- "Go ahead." said the Emperor. "Tell her about the apothecary's shop."

I took a deep breath. "My name is Carrach al-Batir." I said. "My father was an almond merchant ..."

I told her about that fateful day, when I first met Sartag and Yasina, and then how I came to be at the Palace. I described seeing Bishkur, through the lattices, and being asked to impersonate him.

At this point, Bereyar covered her mouth with her hand. She could see the outline of the story we were beginning to tell. She looked as though she would cry, or possibly even bolt from the room.

- "Please, Lady." said Bishkur, in a soft voice. "Wait until you have heard it all." He proceeded to tell her about Yasina's plans to poison her husband, the Emperor Zoer, and to bring on the Night of the Knives. He described her plots and schemes, and left Bereyar in no doubt that Yasina had not done this for him - Bishkur - but for her own ambitions.

"Carrach was a godsend, as far as she was concerned. She could hide me, and leave him exposed. While my half-brothers, the Princes, murdered Carrach, I would be safe." At this point, Bereyar's eyes shifted to me.

"Tell her about that night - and Sartag." said Bishkur.

I described the Night of the Knives, and how I hid on the roof with Sartag. I couldn't read Bereyar's expression, at this point. But I knew, as I stumbled through the story, that she might have run away already, were it not for Bishkur.

- "Carrach almost ruined my mother's plans." said Bishkur. "But she did see the possibility of using him again, in a similar role. Sartag, however, knew too much. She had him murdered. Carrach could do nothing but cooperate, since his father and his maid were virtually hostages."

"Then my mother made an interesting discovery ..." Bishkur described how Yasina had seduced me. He knew a lot more about it than I suspected - no doubt from Nanka.

"It was not difficult." he said to Bereyar. "You have seen my mother. And Carrach could not refuse, since she knew where his father lived."

"I myself, am ... impotent. Partially, at least. Carrach calls it sexual dysfunction, which may be the most accurate way to describe it. Now, can you imagine my mother's reaction, when she discovered that this young man she had in her power, who so closely resembled me, was also virile?"

"You need not hang your head, Carrach." said the Emperor. "These are simple facts. Bereyar can see for herself that you had no choice. Is there more that you wish to tell her at this point?"

I was too embarrassed. So Bishkur described Yasina's plan: to garner a reputation for her son, to create the image of a lusty, virile young ruler.

"When I was at the Palace, my mother would send concubines to Carrach. When I was away, she would allow him to rest, or use him herself. On these occasions, he would ask permission to go home, to visit his father, who was ailing."

Bishkur paused, and asked Bereyar if she wanted something to drink.

- "There's more?" she said. "Some wine, then. Please." My heart went out to her. What must it have been like, to hear this story, and to discover that a large part of your life was built on quicksand? Even the light in her bright eyes was somewhat dimmed.

She looked at me. "Your father's name is Batir? So when you told me about your tutor who had died ..."

- "It was my father." I said.

- "And you couldn't go home, when he was ill ... because of me?"

- "No." I said. "Absolutely not. I didn't even know how sick he was because Yasina wouldn't let me go. It had nothing to do with you."

After a long look at me, Bereyar turned back to Bishkur. "Is there where I enter the story?" she asked.

- "More or less." he said. "My mother was pressuring me to ... hmm ... there is no delicate way to say this. 'Deflower a virgin'. She brought me concubines to ... well ..."

- "I understand." said Bereyar. "Because of your ..."

- "Dysfunction. Precisely. I failed fairly consistently. That gave my mother the idea that she could replace me with Carrach more ... permanently. But it also gave me an idea. You see, there were only one or two people in the Palace - other than Carrach - whom I could trust."

"I needed allies, from outside. Preferably men with swords."

- "My father." she said.

- "Yes. I liked him when we first met, and told him a secret which did not get back to my mother. After that, I felt that I could trust him."

- "So you proposed a marriage alliance."

- "Not quite yet." said Bishkur. "First I arranged a visit to Valkh when I knew that your father was holding a banquet - which you were to attend. I wanted to meet you. Of course, he immediately extended me an invitation."

- "Why?" she asked. "What did it matter, when you needed the alliance?"

- "I wanted to meet you," repeated Bishkur, "to see what I would be getting Carrach into. To my delight, you proved to be intelligent, kind, and lovely. I knew immediately that he would like you. And more important - I knew that you would make an excellent Empress."

- "What do you mean?" she said. "You only contracted the alliance." She looked to me. "Carrach was the one I married."

- "I am not being clear enough, Lady." said Bishkur. "I apologize. But Carrach is every bit as much the Emperor as I am. You are the Empress. And your child will be the heir to the throne. My heir, to be sure. But Our Heir, in fact."

Bishkur turned to me, then. "Carrach," he said, "would you excuse us for a few moments? There is more of the story, which I can tell. But I believe that Bereyar and I have things to say to each other - privately."

I stood up. Bereyar had her head down, as she avoided meeting my eyes. She looked achingly beautiful from that angle. I walked out and left them to it.

Back in my own chambers, I moped about, and did absolutely nothing useful. Nanka came to find me.

- "You stink." she said. "Take a bath."

- "Are they still talking?" I asked.

- "Yes. Take a bath."

I did as I was told. I thought of arguments I could make to persuade Bereyar to stay with me, logical and emotional. Most of them sounded weak, even to me.

After washing, and drying off, I sat on the divan to think. That was where Bereyar found me. She had never been in these rooms, either. She sat down on the divan, as far away from me as possible.

- "Tell me about Minika." she said.

I had no idea what Bishkur had said to her. It didn't matter: I told Bereyar everything, from the day I purchased Min, to sleeping with her, to learning to love her. It took a considerable time. When I finished, Bereyar was silent for a while.

Then she began to speak, with her head down.

- "When the Emperor asked for my hand, I was thrilled." she said. "My first impression of him was quite positive. He seemed ... kind and intelligent. I will also admit that I was happy to escape from General Pitarryat's son."

"But I was also happy, because I was so impressed that the Emperor would turn his energies to improving the people's water supply. There's no glory in it, and no reward other than the satisfaction of a job well done."

"I decided that I wanted to marry the type of man who would do that."

I understood. Poor Bereyar; the man she really wanted was Bishkur.

- "I'm sorry." I said.

She waved my words away. "Bishkur said that he got the idea from you." Finally, she looked up, and met my eyes. "Is that true?"

- "Not really." I said, before I had even considered the consequences of my answer. "It was a stray comment - something my father said, that I told the Emperor about. It was all Bishkur's idea."

- "Why did you marry me?"

Simple question. But now I found it unnerving to have her eye upon me.

- "Because Bishkur asked me to."

- "He told me that you didn't want to." she said.

- "I had ... reservations." I admitted.

- "What were they?"

- "I was afraid. That if we had children ... that they would be killed. By Bishkur, or his mother. Or each other, in the next Night of the Knives."

- "Anything else?" she asked.

- "When he assured me that any children would not die that way, he asked what else worried me. I was petrified of the wedding. I didn't think that I could fool so many people who knew him, or had met him." I said.

- "You had one more fear." she said.

- "Yes. I thought it would be ... unfair to you."

- "So the Emperor told you about Pitarryat's son? He told you that I would be much happier with you?" said Bereyar.

- "Yes."

- "He was right."

It took me a moment to realize what she had said. The light was back in her eyes, and Bereyar was smiling.

- "You mean ..."

- "I can't very well blame you for marrying me under false pretences. You didn't lie to me by choice. Now, if you lie to me in future, that will become a problem."

- "I'm not the Emperor, Bereyar. No matter what Bishkur says. I'm a student. A tutor."

- "I've already told you that I could see us living in a hut by the river. It doesn't matter to me. But if Bishkur says that you're his co-emperor ... well, that's something you'll have to take up with him. He wants our child to succeed him."

- "Are you ..."

- "Sure? As sure as I can be. You make me happy, Carrach. Bishkur asked me how I felt when I was with you. The answer was so simple! I feel wonderful. It would be foolish to give that up."

"I want you to go home first thing tomorrow. You have to collect Minika, and bring her back here. I don't think you'll ever be completely happy unless she's here with us."

- "You don't ... you don't mind?" I was stunned.

- "Carrach - you'll be sleeping with dozens of concubines. Did you think I'd be jealous? As long as I come first, I'll have no reason to complain."

"That's why you can't get Minika until tomorrow. It will be far too late tonight by the time you've finished with me."

Bereyar stood, and began to remove her clothes. She looked back at me, over her shoulder, with a brilliant smile. "What are you waiting for?" she said.

Serim was right. Good fortune does follow me.

*********

EPILOGUE

The Night of the Swords, as it came to be called, was followed by a number of arrests.

The eunuch OPKOR gave away the names of all of Yasina's spies and agents in the Palace, in the hope of gaining clemency.

Captain DANUD cried and begged for mercy.

NOTROH said nothing.

All three were beheaded in the public square. Six other men were executed with them: four Palace Guardsmen, an engineer on the water project, and a Palace clerk who had assisted Opkor in the collecting of bribes.

GAELAVA, the trainer of concubines, was the only woman executed. She was strangled in the Palace dungeon.