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  • The Knowing Ch. 02

The Knowing Ch. 02

12

A/N Ok, so this chapter is really long and there is no sex in it. It sets things up a bit. This story is something a bit experimental. Don't know what I'm doing, just enjoy writing it.

*****

THEN

Jaan

On the way over to Sanchez's house Jaan remembered that he'd forgotten to pay the light bill with the money his mother had left in the drawer by the stove.

She said, "You need to pay the light bill on June 29. The light bill is due the last Monday of each month." He was pretty sure today was the first day of July so... there was that. But now, riding his bike, the wind blowing in his hair he couldn't care less.

He didn't really care much about anything at all really, he was high, he was about to get even higher with Sanchez, and he was two months away from starting his junior year of high school. Three nights ago he had gotten the second best blow job of his life (well he'd only ever had two before) from this Senior girl who wanted him to come over to her house that night and "hang out". He was already in training for basketball season and getting better everyday, and on top of all of this he had hit a recent growth spurt in the last 4 months and he was suddenly aware that every girl was looking at him, even grown women.

Young, high, and careless, Jaan weaved his bike in and out of traffic, his hair blowing in the wind behind him. Jaan lived on the city side of town while Sanchez and his family lived in the more spread out suburban area near the woods. Jaan had known Sanchez and his family for 2 years now. They met Jaan's freshman year when he tried out for the basketball team and somehow made Varsity. As a sophomore, Sanchez was already captain and the star of the team, but he wasn't like most kids. His family was weird. At least that's what Jaan had heard about them, that was before he got to know Sanchez.

The Brown family was a bit notorious in the small college town where they lived, a black family with three kids, all with wild dreadlocks and deep brown skin, the parents where professors at the local college; the mother a Philosophy professor, the father a professor of French. They lived in a modest house on a small plot of land with an above ground pool in the backyard attached to a deck. Sanchez's parents where eccentric to say the least. They had given all of their children Spanish last names as first names because they wanted to create their own army of Cuban revolutionaries. Their house was filled with art and instruments, hundreds of books and a pot of food always on the stove. He vaguely remembered seeing Sanchez's mother once in the grocery store before he met them. He remembered that she was wearing a pair of white painters overalls with a men's button up shirt underneath and a very large afro, it seemed nearly a foot tall. Jaan remembered thinking she was the craziest person he had ever seen. He was sure of it. How could someone go out of their house looking like that? He remembered poking his mother in the arm and then pointing at her, watching as his mother's eye grew wide with shock. "Wow" was all she said.

It was strange to think of his reaction to her then, now that he knew her, especially since she wasn't crazy at all. Rather she was soft spoken and kind with a penchant for painter's overalls and workmen's jumpsuits. Sometimes Jaan wondered if he had a crush on her, only to realize he just liked the way that she cooked often and spoke to her children in the softest French. Whenever he came over to the house and she was home, she'd always ask him if he was hungry, or if he wanted some tea, and then she'd make sure that he sat down while she fed him or gave him his tea or water. Also he remembered the first time he came over to the house that Santiago who was maybe 9 or 10 at the time was having a full blown melt down, sprawled out on the ground with his mother standing over him. The house was filled with light and there was loud experimental jazz music playing in the background. When he and Sanchez walked into the house she yelled something to him quickly in French and then she turned to Jaan and said in an accent so heavy he could barely understand her.

"He just realized his mortality. Now he can't stop crying." Then she walked over and kissed Jaan on the cheek. "Do you want some tea?"

He couldn't believe it. Not only was it the woman from the grocery store but she was kissing him and there was a child with long snakes growing from his head bawling in the middle of the living room floor.

Jaan started coming over more often after that. He rode his bike over most afternoons after school, when they weren't at practice, and in the winters he took the bus halfway through town and then walked.

Sanchez was a funny kid too. He was smart, the star of the basketball team, and also oddly dreamy. Every once and a while he'd catch Sanchez staring absently into space only to turn to him and say, "Can you believe I've been in this body all my life?" totally out of the blue. Jaan liked him for that, and the way that he could turn anything into the best thing, and also that he still built Lego houses for fun but taught himself Russian. The entire Brown family was like that, the oddest mix of contradictions.

That day Jaan was hoping that he and Sanchez would ride their bikes out to the creek to smoke, then go and visit the girls from the party. As weird as Sanchez was, he was amazing with girls. Jaan had watched him for years pulling girls just by smiling. He was beautiful even Jaan could admit it. His hair touched his shoulders and was inky black and wild, running in all directions. His perfectly shaped almond eyes almost always looked half closed. He had the appearance of someone who might have distant Asian ancestry. And his smile, it was his smile that did it. Perfectly white and straight teeth set inside a gorgeous mouth. Sanchez was something of a demi god to women of all ages. The older teachers where enthralled by him, stunned into silence or shock when his brown body sauntered into their classroom and surprised that such a loopy athletic character could ace any test given to him in any class, yet still remain so strange. Maybe that's why they liked him, because inside of this unrelentingly handsome body was a goofy, curious kid.

As Jaan rode the last stretch to Sanchez's house he thought about the pretty redhead at the party who had pulled him into the coat closet to kiss him. As the wind blew against his face he thought about her pretty plump lips on his neck and he could feel that tingling sensation in his stomach.

Jaan dropped his bike on the Brown's front lawn and ran up to the front door to ring the doorbell. Santos opened the door. She had a pair of headphones on her head and one of Sanchez's shirts from the basketball team. It was so large it looked like she didn't have anything on underneath it, but Jaan could see that underneath the shirt she was wearing a pair of shorts with green frogs on them that he was pretty sure belonged to her little brother Santiago. On her face were her thick black-framed glasses that nearly dwarfed her features.

Jaan paused for a minute as they stood staring at each other. He felt that familiar tightness in his chest, the uncomfortable feeling he always felt around her.

He cleared his throat, "Is Sanchez home?"

She twirled the end of her headphone cable in the air, allowing it to wrap around her finger; She shook her head no.

"Do you know when he'll be back?"

She shook her head no again.

"Umm... ok" Jaan backed away from the door slightly.

She laughed lightly, "They're in New York."

"OK, when will they be back?"

She walked away from the door leaving it wide open. Jaan stood there for a moment. Well he could go inside and finish up this conversation or he could continue the conversation from the door and then get on his bike and find Sean or Mike or maybe head over to the Tennis Courts to see if the girl's team was around practicing.

He stepped inside.

Santos

Santos could tell that Jaan was already really high. She knew that he and Sanchez had been getting high a lot that summer, because Sanchez had told her. He had the tendency to tell her everything. Even all the gory details of his silly sexcapades, and some of the trouble he had been getting into. She knew all the girls he liked and the boys he had kissed. She understood how scared he was about his senior year, and applying for colleges. She knew that he spent a lot of his time really sad and was afraid to let other people know it. She knew of all his friends, he liked Jaan the best though he had never told her outright, she knew.

"They'll be back Sunday night" she said sitting on the couch. She picked up the remote control and started the game again.

Jaan stood in the house but just a step away from the doorway. He was debating. She could see that he couldn't tell if he wanted to be in the house with her or leave and do whatever it was he was going to do, but without Sanchez. She continued playing the game trying her best to ignore him standing there.

"Why didn't you go?" he asked. He closed the door behind him and walked over towards her on the couch. He sat on the floor beside it and watched her playing the game.

"I have school."

She was the dumb one. Santiago was 11 in the 8th grade, Sanchez had taught himself Russian, and she was the one in summer school math class because she couldn't get all her math work finished during the school year. Which was a shame because she was already in the super slow math classes. Actually, all her classes were super slow. And she wasn't just taking summer Math; she was taking summer history and English as well. The problem was she just never could seem to get her work done. She understood everything. When she wasn't playing video games or outside with Santiago she usually was reading and writing stories or looking at maps. But when it was time to do the test, or write the stupid report she could never do it. She just couldn't make herself perform on command. So she was stupid probably. She figured as much at least. And she'd struggle through 11th grade just like she struggled through 10th.

"Oh that's right, Sanchez told me."

They sat silent for a minute. Santos looked at Jaan. He was very pretty, but something about him was jagged. His hair was long, too long for a boy but he had worn it that way for as long as Santos knew him. He was maybe the only boy she knew who could wear hair so long and still look masculine even though his hair itself was beautiful, feminine even. Jaan looked back at her, catching her eyes for a split second before she could turn away.

"So how is it going?" he asked

"You know, it's school." She said. Well not quite. She daydreamed a lot more in summer school. She could see out the window, and she would imagine all sorts of things, flying animals, the school melting around her, turning herself into a tornado. She couldn't control her mind as much in summer school, she just wanted to go outside.

"It must suck."

"Yea, it does." she said.

Jaan looked at her again, his eyes where the lightest clearest shade of blue in existence. She had never been alone with Jaan before. He usually avoided her. Most of Sanchez's friends at least said hello or tried to make small conversation. She figured she wasn't like most little sisters. She wasn't cute. She didn't have a lot of friends. She was into girly things in vague ways. Like she knew that she liked make-up though she didn't want to wear it. She liked dolls, but she was too old for that, and she mostly liked them to act out her stories with. Mostly what she did was spend a lot of time with Santiago outside in the woods, riding bikes or playing in the creek. She did feel weird that one of her best friends was an 11 year old and all of his middle school friends, but they didn't judge her much. They let her be quiet when she wanted to, or crack jokes when she wanted too. She had a few friends in her year. Minjun took classes with her and lived in town, they both liked to play video games and swim, but she was in Korea for the summer. David had stopped talking to her after that whole mess a few months before and Sarabelle was officially cool now after losing 30lbs and dying her hair blonde so Santos was very limited in the option of friends.

During summer school she had made friends with a kid named Jeremy. She knew he hung out with the skater kids and she was pretty sure he did a lot of drugs, but for now they mostly talked about manga and she could sense that he liked her because he could be a part of himself he wasn't allowed to be around most of his friends. But Jaan, she could never really figure Jaan out.

She had watched him grow into himself this past year. Well she had always watched Jaan, ever since he came into their house freshman year, but this year as his limbs sprang out and his face matured she noticed that now everyone else noticed him too. Sanchez and Jaan were like a force. Two tall and lanky star basketball players they had carried their team to the state finals, though they lost. In their town they were well loved and liked. Even college students stopped Sanchez in the grocery store wishing him congratulations and inviting him to parties. But Jaan was new to it. She could tell, that though he liked the attention, he wasn't used to it, and he wasn't sure how far he could take things.

He stood up and started walking toward the door, "Ok well, when Sanchez comes back tomorrow, tell him I was here."

"Do you want to go see a cave?" Santos felt itchy, she did not want him to go. That morning she had planned to spend the whole day alone, playing video games and then maybe riding down to the creek. But now that Jaan was there, his body in front of hers she felt like she wanted him to stick around.

"A cave?"

"Yea, we found it, well I found it one day with Santiago when we were just riding around up there."

"Up where?"

"Dover."

"You rode your bike to Dover?"

"Yea, we were just bored last week"

"It's like 10 miles away"

"You ride your bike here everyday"

"Yea but you live 2 miles away from my house"

Santos laughed at him, so hard it surprised her and she covered her mouth. He smiled back at her too. "Do you want to go? It's still early."

Jaan nodded his head. "Yea let's go"

Jaan

She was strange. Usually when he spent time at Sanchez's house he stayed away from her. Well not really stayed away but rather avoided. She seemed to be very aware of people, of himself in particular in a way that made him uneasy. Once when they were in the house sitting at their kitchen counter she walked into a conversation they were having about girls.

"How different is it now?" she said to him absently as she poured herself a glass of water from the sink.

"What?" he said confused. She was midway through filling up her cup, she looked at him like he was stupid.

"Now that you grew and look like this."

He starred at her. He had spent the entire day asking himself the same thing. It was different now that he had suddenly grown and started to look more like pictures of his father.

"Santos you need to learn how to word yourself." Sanchez said in a voice Jaan could tell he had to use on her often. She always seemed to be saying the most obvious thing that no one else was saying.

She shook her head, "What? He looks different now, I mean he looks the same but different. You're in here talking about how all these girls are all on him now and that's the reason why isn't it? I'm just asking him about it."

"Santos," Sanchez said tiredly, "chill out." She rolled her eyes at him and walked out of the kitchen.

He almost never saw her in school, only if he was in the section of the school reserved for the slower kids, the kids with mental issues and health problems. She had a strange and varied group of friends. David Otubenga who was going to be a sophomore and was on the JV basketball squad, and Sarabelle, the first girl Jaan had ever fooled around with. He didn't know the names of the other kids but they seemed just as much as outcasts as her.

Now riding his bike slightly behind her he watched her dreadlocked hair blowing in the wind. On the ride over they had already tried racing and she was pretty good at doing wheelies, something that he couldn't even do. He sped up a bit to ride beside her and she looked at him, widening her eyes and baring her teeth.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey what."

"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife?"

Jaan thought about if for a minute, "No?"

"Well, neither has he." She grinned at him and then sped up again prompting him to chase after her.

She was strange indeed.

The 10-mile bike ride to Dover wasn't nearly as intense as Jaan expected. Besides for a few hills they made it there in a little more than an hour. She pulled her bike over to the side near a river overlook right off the main road. He jumped off too and walked his bike over to hers where she chained them up to a guardrail.

"We just have to walk down here for a bit." She said pointing to a path that led off down toward the river, but then bent up towards the woods a bit.

She started off down the path, her hands in the pocket of her frog shorts, and then stopped and looked back at him for a moment and starred. She was sweating a bit, her glasses sliding down her nose and her hair pushed up off her face awkwardly.

"What?" Jaan said looking back at her.

They stood staring at each other for a beat too long and then she said, "Do you have any siblings?"

"No, you know that." She was still standing still but Jaan walked towards her.

"That must be lonely," she said. He was standing near to her now, they where maybe 8 inches apart and facing each other.

"It is." Jaan said, she looked at his chest and poked it delicately with her finger, and then continued down the path toward the cave.

They walked in silence for a few minutes before she started talking again. Jaan had heard her do this once before with Santiago. She made up stories. She did them in a way that made Jaan think she was just starting a conversation, but it was only a moment before he realized that she was leading him into her weird imagination.

"Ok so imagine this, you're a kid that has three arms and you have to hide one of them."

"Three arms?"

"Yea, and you have to hide one of the arms,"

"Where would it be?"

"It depends."

"Ok, so how do I hide it?"

"Well that's the thing it only appears where you need it, exactly when you need it."

"How does that work?"

"So you're in the kitchen you have to stir the pot, add the butter and the milk at the same time to make a sauce."

"You're making a béchamel?"

"What?"

"That's what the name of that sauce is called, a béchamel, Flour, butter and milk."

"How do you know that?"

"I work in a kitchen."

"Yes, like that. Then your third arm would appear."

"Ok that's weird"

"But it would also appear when you needed to get out of bad situations."

"How?"

"Well it can open doors into other worlds"

"Like universes?"

"Well no just another part of your same existence. So if I wanted to get out of this situation my arm would appear and then I'd open a door and I'd end up, wherever I wanted to go, but in this same world or existence."

"So not time travel?"

"No, like maybe a portal."

"That's convenient"

"Yes but sometimes it misinterprets situations and you open doors when you don't want to you walk into situations even stranger than the one you came out of"

Jaan laughed, "Where do you get this stuff from?"

"You have to follow me," she said.

Jaan looked at her, she was walking now into the woods. Not on the path, but into a thicket of trees.

She kept talking. Sanchez told Jaan once that he loved Santos more than anything in the world. They were talking about food. Jaan had said jokingly that he loved pizza more than his mom, to which Sanchez answered that he loved Santos more than any food or anything he could imagine. Jaan couldn't believe it. What teenage boy loved his sister that much? Didn't he love his brother just as much too, and what about his parents?

12
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