Love is Stupid and Great Ch. 02

That next morning, Oliver woke up pretty early, as he only slept about three hours. The couch definitely wasn't ergonomic and he had a good idea why that married couple tried to throw it out in the first place. He laid in bed for probably an hour or so before he got up. But after a quick breakfast of mini wheat's and some tea, he went to check his email. And... well...

"Motherfucker! Goddamn it!"

Yeah.

Oliver had checked his email, hoping to hear back from some of the people he had lined up to help him in some fashion. And he got some news from Mark that the voice actor they had to play the main character has bailed on the project. And they can't do anything about it, as the contract they had him sign stated that even if he didn't work, the money they paid him upfront is still legally his. In other words, their douchey employee ripped them off. He fucking hated lying, cheating bastards like that.

Oliver was running his hands through his hair, "Fuck him, man. That was four hundred and fifty dollars out of my own goddamn wallet right there. If I ever see that fucker around this campus I swear to God-"

"Uh. Hey?"

Oliver turned his head back to look at April who was standing in the doorway. And his heart rate picked up for a few moments. Her hair was ruffled around, her low-collared t-shirt revealing quite a bit of cleavage, and her pajama pants clung to her skin. With her little smirk, he thought she looked so tired and sexy without even really trying to. She definitely didn't make this short stay at his house easy on him, he could at least say that much. So he spun around and sat forward.

"Hey."

April leaned against the doorframe and cocked one of her eyebrows, "So... I take it something's got under your skin."

Oliver used his head to gesture to his computer, "Work."

"School stuff, huh?" As Oliver got up, April began walking to the living room as he followed close behind.

"Nah. Game stuff," He said as he went into the kitchen.

"Oh, I didn't know you still did that kind of stuff. Sort of thought you stopped after highschool or something," April sat down on one of the chairs at the kitchen counter.

"Why? Because it's childish?" Before April could retort, he chuckled, "It's fine. No, no I didn't stop. This is something I sort of live for, you know. This is most of what I do every single day."

"Oh. So you're majoring in game design?"

Oliver gave her a short nod then followed with, "So, uh, do you want some breakfast? I could make some eggs."

"That'd be nice. You don't have to though."

He didn't even respond, he just grabbed the eggs out of the fridge along with some PAM and a frying pan to get started. April observed him closely for a little bit, trying to figure out what exactly was different about him, because there sure as hell was something. But she couldn't put her finger on it.

"So... do you want to talk now?" April asked.

"No, let's wait until after you've eaten. I assume you've got plenty to talk about, huh?" Oliver broke open the eggs over the heated pan and watched it sizzle for a moment. He took a deep breath in; the nice warm air of his apartment calmed him down, as he kept tensing up every time he looked her way.

"Okay."

April sat in silence and watched him cook for her. She kept trying to pinpoint this 'something' about him. He definitely did look older, his face was growing a beard at this point and she didn't remember him ever having one. He looked more tired, but she could imagine that college life plus working with games must have brought him down some. But it wasn't any of that, exactly. Maybe he seemed a lot less volatile. She didn't know at this point.

"I don't know what to talk about," She admitted.

"Me neither," Oliver watched the water droplets form upon the glass cover over the pan.

"How are you, I guess? As a person?" April tapped her fingers on the counter.

But Oliver didn't answer. To be honest, he didn't really know the answer to that question. He didn't know what to tell her, he just was.

"Eggs are ready," He murmured, putting the eggs onto a white plate and, along with a glass of juice, handed her the food he made for her, "Let's go sit on the couch."

"Thank you."

Oliver just let her eat for a little bit and tried to think about how to start this conversation. He really was never good with talking to women, especially about sentimental shit. Well, assumedly. He knows she got kicked out of her apartment, so it's gotta be over something bad. You don't just walk over to your roommate one day, shake her hand, and tell her to get the fuck out and everything's peachy. And why is she standing for it? Like, doesn't she have a legal right to her place as well?

He didn't notice as he was deep in thought, but she had already finished her eggs by the time he had finished his thought. But when he did come to, he noticed her fidgeting with her hands, and cleared his throat.

"So. Um. What happened?"

April sat there for a few seconds and then took a deep breath, "Well... as I said it's a long story."

"And as I said, I got time."

April smiled weakly, "Yeah. You did. Okay well... phew..."

Oliver watched on as she turned herself toward him, "When you left... I didn't really have anyone to be with. I was very lonely... I... so I met this guy. His name's Lee Robertson. He was really nice to me, cause I'd always come by the music store he worked at."

"The one on 11th?" Oliver interrupted.

"Yeah, that one. I came by a lot, so much so that it became obvious that I just wanted to see him. And he was pretty into me as well. So eventually he pulled out these tickets to a concert in town and... well, obviously you can guess we started going out."

Oliver felt a sharp pain in his chest at that. He tried not to react at all and he was sure he did a good job of playing it off, nodding slowly at what she said. He didn't want to hear about this kind of stuff. It hurt him to know that April was happy with someone else. That someone else got to hold her at night, caress, and touch her in ways he had only dreamed of doing. He remembered feeling like this all the time in highschool whenever he heard that April was going out with this guy named Jack, who frequently picked on him and tried to pick fights. And he knew what the pain was. It's simple. He was just being jealous.

"And uh... he was great. Jack never really gave a shit, so, it was nice that someone checked on me regularly, who did things because he liked me, and who genuinely just cared about me. There are not a lot of people who have been sincere with me like that before. I was head-over-heels for him, you know?"

April began to play with her pajama pants with one hand as she continued, "Lee was a musician. He was super talented as well. He knew how to play the piano, the electric guitar, and to sing. He would write songs for me whenever something big happened or whenever he felt like it. At least once a week, I got a mini-concert where he played a song or two that he was working on for me."

Oliver nearly frowned, but stopped himself. When did this story take a turn for a worse? Cause it has to, right? Oliver's seen this story enough times from his friends before: they meet someone, that someone is awesome, that someone gets comfortable with them, that someone stops trying, and then that someone becomes emotionally abusive. It seems to be a formula with most relationships nowadays. So at this point he was bracing himself to watch her cry, as he had done too many times, and to comfort her through this.

"I ended up getting into the same college as you when I graduated. Lee and I were pretty serious at that point, so he decided he'd come with me, as there was an opening at a local music store around here. You know it? It's called 'The Bomb'," Oliver nodded and she went on, "Yeah. So we were pretty excited. But my family wasn't. They thought I was going too fast with this guy I met a year ago. I was pretty angry then. Like, how dare they say that, right? They weren't around for pretty much all of my teenage life in highschool, so where do they get off trying to tell me what I should do in my adult life, you know?"

Oliver stayed silent. He honestly didn't know how to respond to that. The only time he's ever had a real argument with his mom was over his philosophy on fighting, which was pretty simple - "If those jackasses mess with me, I'm going to hit them in the mouth." Obviously, he was messed with quite often, so his mother despised the idea that he was going to come home every day with a new wound or scar to show off. But regardless, when he told his family he was going to college to become a game designer, they were all in support for him. Hell, his brother already worked in the business as a voice actor, so it ran in the family.

"So I uh... I told them to fuck off and I ran away with Lee to college," April admitted, pinching the loose cloth at her knees.

"Wh-what?" Oliver raised an eyebrow.

"It wasn't really like... running away, I guess. I was just going to college, I would've done that regardless if he came with me or not. But he did. I haven't really... spoken to them since then. Daddy on occasion but like, yeah."

"Jesus, April," Oliver rubbed his forehead, "You could've told me about this, you know? And then I could've-"

"Could've what, Oliver?" He stopped talking immediately as the slight, but sudden raise in her voice, "Could've fixed what had been broken for years? I don't think so. You're not Superman. And how could I have told you, Ollie? You cut yourself off from everyone when you left town. I texted you so, so many times to try and get ahold of you after that and you just didn't respond. By the time I got here and I saw you 'round campus, what difference would it have made for me to come talk to you? You would've just... I don't know what you would have done. Probably nothing."

Oliver wouldn't meet her eyes. She was exactly right. But he sure as hell didn't want to admit it.

April began playing with her hair, "Should I go? I made things awkward, didn't I?"

"Just... keep going, all right?"

"I..." April swallowed, "Okay."

And with another deep breath, "So, like, we came here. We got a small apartment that was just big enough for the both of us and we just started... living life you know. He worked on his music and I went to classes. I tried being the most supporting girlfriend I could be."

Oliver just stayed silent, he definitely wasn't happy about any of this conversation, but she continued with, "But I think I said Lee's talented right? He is. He's really good and someone noticed. I forget his name, but it was something but it was something super Jewish. Greenberg or Rosenberg or something. Definitely a berg in there. But anyway, that doesn't matter, point is, he came home one day beaming, saying he'd gotten a record deal and he was taking me out to dinner."

"That's good," Oliver muttered to her.

April shrugged in reply, "Yeah. We moved out after staying in the old apartment for like three months and got into a bigger place. Lee was able to even get his dog from back home to come live with us then. Before, we were living on ramen, takeout, and tap water, but now we were able to make dinners for ourselves, to order in, to go out. He could buy me things and did a lot. It was cool. Like, I felt that we made a good decision for once. Lee's best friend, Dan, would come over all the time too cause he lived like across the street from the new place. And then I was introduced to some of his friends. Felt like we were actually living our own lives rather than the one's our parents planned out for us."

"Lee was working a lot then. He was trying to get an album out. Whenever I got home from classes, he was working until he went to sleep for most days out of the week. And whenever we did spend time together, his mind was in another place. In his music. I was getting sort of sad, but Lee's friends were usually hanging around, so I hung out with them while waiting for him to get off work. We were managing. I knew he was working so hard on his album for me, he wanted us to live a high life. But... ya know. Still wasn't fun not seeing him."

"I can imagine," Oliver whispered under his breath. He knew the feeling well. His mother worked most of the time when his father left, so he was never really able to hang out with her except on weekends. But still, she did it for him and his brother.

"But then one day he takes me out for a really fancy dinner out of the blue. And I'm really excited and all that and guess what? He proposes. He says he's done with most of his work, so we're going to spend a bunch more time together. And like... obviously, I accept."

And then Oliver's heart beat so hard it thought it would burst. Ap-April is... his April was engaged to another guy? They were... going to get married and... Jesus Christ.

But that train of thought didn't last long, as he realized that if she was kicked out, it must've meant that they broke up right? Right? Please, God, he must be right. But even then... that's not good. If they broke up, she must be fuckin' heartbroken now and all he's thinking about is what he wants. Agh. And immediately, he feels terrible about himself and about thinking that.

"But... nothing changed. He said something like they were doubling the length of the album or something like that. He even took a few trips by himself to San Diego, where the recording studio is. I kept trying to reach out for him, but he was so determined to finish that damn album that he always just shrugged me off. And there I was, wearing a diamond ring that meant nothing since he wasn't there, feeling lonelier than I ever have in my entire life. I had no friends, no family, and my fiancée was barely around. The only people I could say were close were Lee's friends."

"So I hung out with them. Mostly with Dan. Dan was similar to me. In college and not really sure what he wanted to do with his life. He works at a Nordstrom's around here. We found we had a lot in common and had the same sense of humor."

Oliver didn't like where this story was going.

"So, like, eight months after we got here, I get a call and Lee says he was going to stay a week in San Diego. I become furious and I blow up at him about how he never spends time with me, how I'm always second in his mind, and how I've sacrificed so much to be with him, but yet, he gives nothing back. I don't even remember what he said back, I think he apologized. But I just hung up and cried. Dan came by. And then he... he like... he was just so sweet and caring... and soft... and-"

Oh my fucking God.

Oliver's eyes widened noticeably, but she was in her own little world as she spoke, so she didn't notice. His heart began to beat at about a thousand beats per second. He felt suddenly hot and kind of sick to his stomach.

April... April wouldn't do that. She's the funny little tomboy that would make fun of him for crying. She... she wouldn't possibly think of being unfaithful to her fiancée? No. No that-that...

Oh God.

What the hell did she do?

"So for that week we just... we cared for each other. I was so lonely then and he was there. Dan was so gentle with me. So kind and caring. He said all these nice things to me and I just let myself get lost in him. And when it came to the end of that week, I didn't want him to go."

Stop. Stop talking about it.

"Then Lee came home and he immediately changed. He started making more time for me, he made sure that every other night was a date night in some way for us. He began doing the mini concerts and all that shit again. He was being such a good guy to me. He even started planning the wedding with me but... but-"

Please don't say it.

"Every time I tried to bring it up to Dan, to tell him it was over... he just... he knew me. We always ended up... together. He told me he loved me and he was ready to be with me whenever I left him. He was willing to just be there even if I did marry Lee. I... I couldn't-"

Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

"But I wouldn't leave Lee. He was trying so hard for me and that's all I wanted. I kept telling Dan I didn't want to be with him anymore. But he wouldn't listen. Then one night, a month or two after I broke it off, when Lee was out working, he comes by and... he starts pushing all those buttons that get me... that get me the way I was with him. And we're going at it again and just... and then Lee was there. And then Dan was getting punched and ran out the door."

No... no no no.

"Lee wasn't even angry. From the beginning of our relationship, he never once yelled or swore at me even if we had a fight. After beating up and chasing off Dan he just looked broken. He told me to get my stuff packed and to get out. So I got out and when I went by Dan's place he told me to fuck off. So I stayed with one of Lee's other friends for... I guess it's been a month now, but then he heard about what happened and told me to get out and then I realized I don't have family and I don't have any friends and I didn't want to be lonely again-and I-and I-and I..."

April broke down and began crying, throwing herself into Oliver. She gripped his shirt in both hands as she let out heart wrenching sobs over and over again as tears stained the tired grey of Oliver's clothing. His hands were in the air, stuck there from the surprise of her sudden breakdown. But even after being shocked to the core buy her actions, even after feeling this dark resentment to her for what she did... she was still his April. And she needed a hug.

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..."

So he wrapped his arms around her and allowed her to weep in his embrace. He didn't know how to feel. He just felt confused in general. A little annoyed, a little depressed, a little sympathetic, and a little heartbroken. All of that mixed into one weird, swirling emotion of shit.

Oliver didn't say a word for the next half hour as she let out every emotion she'd been holding in for the last two days. He just made sure she knew that she was there by holding her. In any other situation, this would've been a dream come true, but now... it just felt hollow.

"God... every time we meet up, one of us ends up crying, huh?" April sputters out, wiping her face of tears.

Oliver nodded as a reply, allowing her to sit up and try to straighten herself out. Staying with her a little bit, he pulled out his phone and checked the time.

"Ah, shit, I have to go to classes now."

"Oh," April said.

Oliver sat back, sighed, and then got up to go get ready, "I'll be back later. I'll bring home something to eat. But if you get hungry, the kitchen's free reign."

"Okay."

"Cool, well, uh... I'll see you later, April," Oliver went to get his jacket on, came back, grabbed his keys, and was about to walk out the door.

"Ollie?"

He turned back at the sound of his pet name, "Yeah?"

"Do you think I'm a bad person?"

The million-dollar question. How was Oliver supposed to answer that? Yes, a little. She probably ruined Lee's life. People can commit suicide over things like this. But he knew she didn't do it maliciously. She's not like that. He has to believe she's not like that or there was no point to the decade plus long friendship they've had. He has to. But the best way to answer this sort of question is to be honest. So that's what he'll do.

"April, I don't think you're a bad person. Not completely. I think you are a lonely, hurt woman who's made a lot of big mistakes. But you're also kindhearted, loving, and a beautiful young lady. And you're my friend. So I'm here for you, even if I maybe shouldn't be."

Oliver left the house with that. He walked right out of the apartment, not letting her reply to his declaration. He just needed to focus on class at this point, because if he lets his thoughts wander to all of the things that April has been doing these past few years, he might go insane.